Be My Dreamcatcher [girlxgirl]

Sixteen

"I think we can release Ms. Leigh tomorrow morning," Dr. Liu informs us with a smile.

It's been three days in here, three days of a gradually ebbing pain, of staring at the stark white ceilings, of this heavy feeling on my chest that is not because of my broken ribs, and of looking at Eva looking at me with worried eyes.

Right now, she's barely holding in her squeals on the news.

"Thanks, Doc." She mock salutes him with two fingers.

"Just doing my job," he murmurs before gliding out of the room.

I think he's afraid of Eva. Or at least intimidated by her.

The only productive thing that came out of my stay here was that I was able to listen to every little detail about Benjamin that Joanna and Travis had to offer, and comfort Eva simultaneously.

Turns out, when Ethan came to know about what Benjamin had done, he was indeed mad. But when he came to know about what Lydia ended up doing, he was pretty okay. Okay as in, she-can't-be-anyone's-if-not-mine okay.

Two fucking deranged men.

So for three months, Benjamin had to go in hiding (that's why the shabby house) while Ethan kept vigil on Eva from outside. When he saw an opportunity to do that from the very inside of Evelyn Bridgers' workplace, that is, the job of my assistant, he grabbed it by neck.

My guess is that he planned to take stock of the situation and figure out if we have any proof or such; however we did everything before that.

What's funny to me in this whole scenario, from the very beginning to the end, is that the blood we found was pure chance. There was no blood involved in what Benjamin did; he just cut his palm accidentally while raping Lydia Ackles. Which happened in her closet.

Fucking irony.

"Did Benjamin say something about visiting the museum?" I ask Eva as she sits down beside me on the hospital bed. She just talked to Joanna for twenty minutes and I had asked her to ask them to ask him that.

"Nope, nothing. Was probably just visiting his ass brother or something." Who, by the way, is also arrested for being a criminal accomplice.

I let out a breath to expel all thoughts of dickheaded brothers out of my head for a while.

I've got something more important to do.

"Okay so, Eva, I've been meaning to talk to you . . ."

She turns to me, alarmed. "Oh no, that is never good." Then she grins. "Are you gonna break up with me?"

And before I can stop the expression, it comes undone on my face and takes hold, making my intentions clear to Eva whose smile has vanished.

"What? I was just kidding, Charley. Good joke, huh?" This in the tone of a person who's begging someone to just tell them that it is joke.

When I fail to correct her, she sighs and drops her head into her hands. "You know what's weird? I kind of saw this coming. I mean after everything my acquaintance has subjected you to, it's only logical that you'd want space from me."

Wait, no, that's not where I was going with this.

"Wait, no, Eva, that's not where I was going with this. I mean not the latter part," I add after seeing the hopeful look on her face.

I take her hand and try to fill my lungs with as much air as I can. "It's true that I need some space from this . . . relationship. And yes, maybe it is somewhat because of how you need to figure your shit out after all this."

"I don't want to do that alone, though." She sounds like a child, which plunges the hurt deeper into my chest.

"I know, and maybe we can be friends for a while, you know? After all, I'd be around you at work. At least, I hope so, if my boss hasn't fired me."

This brings out a sad chuckle from her, if I can call it that. She locks her fingers tightly with mine and the thumb sweeping over my knuckles is doing funny things to my stomach.

"But why?" Eva says.

"I don't, I can't, okay look. Have you heard of the quote 'What a treacherous thing it is to believe that a person is more than a person'?"

"Yes . . .?" She's eyeing me warily.

"That's how I see you. Not as a woman who's hurting, but as a mystified entity came here to bring excitement in my life. Like, maybe not entirely but yes it's there. And that kind of romanticization is objectification. And, and, you don't deserve that."

I'm so bad at explaining this.

I continue, "I know it may sound like some fake hippie wine mom bullshit to you, but I seriously need to change the way I look at you before I try to give you a proper relationship. And—"

"I get it." The expression on Eva's face seems like she's having flashes from all the years of her life. "I get it now. Because, you know, I did the same to Lydia. Not always but I ended up doing the same for her and maybe that's why, that's why, you know?"

I grab her shoulders and half hug her from the side. "This is gonna be hard but I think we both do need some time. You need to look at your life and Lydia's death from a different perspective after everything went down. And I need to do, uh, whatever I said just now."

"But do I have to do this alone?" None of us is crying yet there's this crack in every syllable of our words that says one windstroke and we're down from the cliff.

"I will be there. As a friend. Working with you."

"I don't want you just as a friend."

"For me, Eva, please? I don't think I can bear to be in a relationship where I hate myself every time I call my girlfriend beautiful because I have a feeling that a part of me sees her as an object of excitement or salvation or whatever."

She breaks away from the hug and faces me, taking my face in her hands carefully. "But you'll let me take care of you? You're not perfectly well right now physically."

"Okay." I know she needs this.

She closes her eyes in that ever familiar gesture. "How much time?"

"Maybe for once we can figure things out as we go, Ms. Bridgers."

"Okay."

A single tear escapes Eva's eye and makes a small plunking sound on her arm, marking the end of the best adventure I had in my life.
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A/N: huh, last chapter Awesomers. y'all have no idea how much I've sweated over getting this chapter right but brief. i think brevity was the most important part of this break up.

so the next is epilogue and I've completed drafting it so congratulate me, yayy!

i don't know when I'll post it but i'm so excited to finish this and start another project. 'huff'. okay i'm done rambling. stay tuned for the epilogue.

do you think anything huge will happen now?

and thoughts on the overall story?