Bewitched | wolfstar au

Ninety-two

Going to bed with Sirius is delightful.

He turns his back to Remus and pulls Remus' arm around him, and falls asleep so easily and promptly that Remus almost calls his name to see if he's not pretending.

It's a bit awkward at first, like when Sirius' hair ends up too close to Remus' nose, and he can't even remove his hand to scratch it because Sirius has it tucked under his arm. But Sirius' warmth, and the innocent touch of his back against Remus' chest is the loveliest thing Remus has felt in a long time.

Still, Remus is wide awake. It's a new development, this struggle to find sleep, this feeling of minutes and hours all blurring together and the very awareness of time passing being what keeps him awake.

He closes his eyes and presses his chin on Sirius' shoulder, hoping it would bring him some ease. It doesn't. His back is starting to hurt, that familiar dull ache spreading through his muscles. It's the type of pain you can't tell comes from where, the kind that hits you in waves all at once.

This weekend, Remus will have to transform again.

And he really, really doesn't want to.

Feeling sweaty and in need of cool air, he gently removes his arm from Sirius, who, blissfully sedated by the Potions he still has to take, doesn't even stir.

Remus adjusts the blankets over him before quietly making his way out of the room. He enters the balcony, where just over an hour ago he was with Sirius.

And for the second time, he catches himself surprised at the sight of someone standing there.

It's his father.

"Uh, dad?" Remus calls, popping his head out of the door. "You okay?"

Lyall turns around to face him, brow raised in surprise. "Remus," he smiles a little, "You almost gave me a heart attack,"

"Only almost," Remus gives him a plastic smile in response.

"Only almost," Lyall smiles at him.

Remus stands there for a moment, not sure if he should leave or stay. But then he catches sight of the moon and it makes him pause. His father takes this as a sign that he doesn't want to leave.

"You, uhm..."

Watching his father grapple for words like a lost child is both disappointing yet, in an odd way, satisfying, too. Remus leans back against the doorframe, waiting.

"You can't sleep?" Lyall eventually asks.

Remus shrugs. Thinking that it's rude not reply, he then speaks up. "Back hurts," he mumbles.

"Your transformation is near," Lyall says, his tone careful.

Thanks, I really needed to be reminded, Remus wants to say. "Yeah," he replies instead, shrugging once more.

"I, uhm," Lyall clears his throat, "How will you..."

"Wolfsbane," Remus replies, and he surprises himself with how cold he sounds. "I can afford it now."

Lyall looks away, nodding.

"I'm gonna go—" Remus straightens himself. He's mid-turn when Lyall stop him.

"Remus,"

It's the most urgent Remus has ever heard him. Well, ever since that night he got bitten by a werewolf and his father was calling his name, but Remus ended up passing out almost immediately so it's not like he can remember too well.

"Yes, dad?"

"I..." Lyall ventures a step closer and, if Remus is being honest, it makes him feel sorry for his father, how unsure he looks talking to his own son. "I'm sorry, son," he eventually chokes out.