Our Darkest Memories

13. Opening the Past

Raiden turned around, held out his hand for me to grab it, and helped me get up by pulling me up from the ground. "Shall we?" I could almost hear how he winked at me before he turned around and followed Nadia. I quickly started to head after them before they could disappear in the darkness of the nights.

*****

We were all seated in cabin 27. Nadia had also called Blaze, and she was sitting cross-legged on one of the beds in the cabin. Raiden sat on the other bed and I was located on a chair, but Nadia remained standing and was pacing around the space.

"Okay, so here is what we know now," she started. "You three were separated and Morgan ended up here in the camp. When Morgan and I met, well, let's just say we had plans that Clancy didn't agree to. That eventually led to me forgetting that we met, and Morgan forgetting about you two."

"But she is my sister. He would have to have erased a lot of her life then."

My eyes darted to Blaze. Sister? That was new information. Very new. I immediately looked at Blaze with new eyes. Her hair, which was hanging in a long ponytail, was slightly curled and was a brunette color, as opposed to my straight, blonde hair. Also, my skin was paler compared to her skin. In her face, I could also not recognize much of my features.

They all saw me looking at Blaze, who gave me an apologetic look. "I'm sorry, Morgan. I really wanted to tell you, but I couldn't. Besides, I thought that maybe deep down you already knew. I know we don't look much alike, but because of the promise..."

My thoughts went back to earlier that day when Blaze had also mentioned a promise. I hadn't put much thought into it, but now it made me wonder what the promise was. Trying to remember, I got a headache, but I kept trying to think about it. Until finally, a memory popped into my mind. A familiar voice saying five simple words. My voice saying those words and with them making a promise: "I will always protect you."

I took a deep breath to get rid of the pressure on my chest that was building up. The headache left a throbbing trace of pain but gradually started to decrease. It made me think a little clearer. That's when I knew why meeting Blaze again went the way that it did.

Plastering a smile on my face, I answered, "At least I know about it now." I turned back to Nadia. "So how do I get my memories back? How did you do it?"

"I didn't. Clancy did. But without him wanting to."

I raised an eyebrow. "You mean he accidentally gave you back your memories? How would he have done that?"

Nadia started to explain that when she was called to Clancy, he had wanted to make Nadia forget about her thoughts of me again. But while he was busy messing around in her head, I barged into the room, which interrupted Clancy's work. Nadia had pretended like Clancy had succeeded so that he wouldn't try it again. "The point is, Clancy was interrupted while he was in my mind. That's how the memories came back. He couldn't put them back in the corner they came from."

"So all we have to do is get Clancy in Morgan's memories and then interrupt it?" Blaze asked as if that was going to get easy. Clancy was clever. He would notice quite easily when he was getting tricked. Besides, I would have to have a good reason to get him into my mind.

Nadia also doubted that that would work. "I think that it is not as simple as it sounds. Maybe there is another way. Since now we know that the memories are there, we could try to just make Morgan think about them. Maybe that would sort of unlock them."

All eyes turned expectantly to me and I let out a sigh. Closing my eyes, I tried my best to remember my past life. I tried to focus on my lost memories, but what would I have to focus on? My youth? My experiences with Raiden? My sister-time with Blaze?

It's hard to remember what you forgot.

So eventually, I gave up and let my hands hang down in defeat. "I can't think about them. And to be honest, I don't want to. I'm getting a headache from it."

Nadia didn't seem too bothered by it. "That's what I thought. You see, I think that whatever Clancy did made us unable to think about our memories. Say, erase them?"

"Okay, but why would he do that?"

"I know you don't remember yet, but before he made us forget, we did something that made him... incredibly mad. But he liked you, so instead of simply getting rid of us, he altered our memories."

"He made you forget about parts of your past that he didn't want you to remember. That way, he ensured that you would stay," Raiden finished Nadia's story. She nodded to show that she agreed with his theory.

It sounded reasonable, but there was a hole in the story. "There's one thing wrong about your theory though. Clancy manipulates thoughts, not memories. He can't have manipulated my memories."

Raiden was lost in thoughts for a moment. "Then there is a difference between oranges. The orange that I once met could see memories. That's how he knew how to scare us. There must be an explanation for this."

Nadia jumped up. "He doesn't have to manipulate memories. He just needs you to not think about them. Kind of like suppressing them. What if he is able to do that?"

The amount of new information was barging in and I felt like I was drowning in it. "I'm not following."

"He can order people to do things right? And make them think about certain stuff?"

I nodded hesitantly.

"You said before that you didn't want to think about your memories. That something was holding you back from that. What if he didn't manipulate our memories, but ordered us to not think about them the same way he would order someone else to pick up something? It makes sense why you have gotten heavy feelings of déjà vu's. I had them too. Those were probably our memories that slipped into your mind because the situation was so similar, but you made them go away because you were ordered to not think about the past."

This explanation sounded more accurate. It could even be true. And everyone started to realize that too because the excitement started to be visible in the room.

"We know how it all works," Blaze said, "so now, we only have to come up with a plan."