Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss [Ed Sheeran x Margaret Thatcher]

Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss

"What the fuck do you want, Boris?" Margaret huffed.

"We need to talk, Margaret, you've been ignoring me for weeks and now I find out you're shagging Ed Sheeran," Boris retorted angrily "I deserve an explanation at least!"

"You don't deserve shit, Boris! I know about you and Nigel; what's one supposed to do when she finds out her husband's a bloody queer and has been shagging her good friend? You know what? FUCK YOU BORIS! I'm going to find Ed, he would never leave me for another man and he knows how to use a fucking hairbrush."

"NIGEL'S A BETTER SHAG THAN YOU ANYWAY!" Boris yelled as Margaret stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind her.

"Ed?" Margaret called out into the dark lobby; it was pitch black apart from a thin sliver of light coming from a room at the end of the corridor.

"Ed?" She called again heading towards the slightly ajar door.

As Margaret gently pushed open the door, she was presented with a horrifying scene.

"WHAT THE FUCK ED!" Margaret yelled, stepping away from the bed where Ed and Obama were shagging.

"I've had enough of all these fucking queers everywhere!" She huffed and stormed out before Ed or Obama could say a word.

"Oh dear, I hope I haven't got in the way of your relationship." Obama said worriedly.

"Not at all, Obama chan, you're a better shag than her anyway." Ed replied as they continued to shag.

"Margaret?" Boris Johnson's voice called from out in the lobby.

"Margaret?" Footsteps approached Ed and Obama's room as Boris called again.

"Margar-" Boris stopped abruptly as he entered the room.

"I- uh- s- sorry to disturb you uh-" He blushed.

"Care to join us, senpai?" Obama said, out of breath.

"YES. I mean uh- I suppose so." Boris replied joining them in bed for a shag.

Two hours later Boris, Ed and Obama had just finished shagging and they were all very out of breath, so much so that Ed had to pull his inhaler out of his ass.

"I don't suppose Nigel will be very happy about this; I'd better get going-" Boris began.

"No. You can't leave." Said Nicocado Avocado, appearing suddenly from the bathroom.

"What the fuck- have you been in there the whole time?" Obama gasped.

"Yeah, I was trying to take a shit then you came in and started fucking so I figured I'd better not disturb- I heard every word. And don't worry about Nigel, I ate him- he was really pissing me off." Nicocado sighed
"Anyway you can't leave because when I was in there taking a shit, listening to y'all fucking, I realised it was you three all along- you were meant to be together. Like the holy trinity or whatever- something like that. Boris- gaslight, Ed- gatekeep and Obama- girlboss."

[I decided I am going to write part 5 so it will be up soon 😃😩]