Luna

12 | tell me everything

Even though it doesn't make the pain in my heart any less, but the night breeze indeed feels good on my skin.

Max takes off his coat and drapes it around me, knowing that it's windier here near the river -- I'm only wearing a bikini and skirt, anyway.

"Thanks." I can't help the blush creeping on my face from the embarrassment, from realizing how stupid I must look right now. I pull his coat tighter to hide my body, inhaling his masculine scent that lingers on it.

Strangely, it's soothing and not overwhelming.

Shoving his hands into his pants pockets, Max lays his back against his car as we stare at the view of the river and the bridge ahead of us. I lay my back against his car too, looking up at the moon.

It's a half-moon tonight.

"Whenever you're ready," Max says without looking at me, and I know that he's expecting me to talk to him, to let it out.

I feel tears starting to fill my eyes again. Why am I becoming so emotional? I used to be just fine holding it up all this time.

But after what happened tonight, maybe it's okay to break?

I don't know.

It's not easy for me to pour my feelings into someone else. Even when I used to have pillow talks with Rory, I was more of a listener than a talker.

Rory.

"We were best friends," I blurt out.

Yes, we were. Now, it's clear to me that she will never consider me as her best friend anymore.

Max is silent, and I guess that he expects me to continue.

"A drawing," I say. "It started from a drawing. The first time she talked to me, she was complimenting my drawing. I don't even remember what I drew that time, but I remember her smile that was so big on her face as she approached my desk."

A soft smile touches my lips as I remember that moment. I take a deep breath of the cool night air.

"I'm never an outgoing person," I say. "I'm more of an introvert. Rory, on the other hand, is the opposite. She can be a bit nosy, but she made me really happy. People who knew how close we were always said that I was like the water, while she was the fire. Oddly, we got along really well."

I treasured the moments we'd spent together.

"I never thought that because of one guy, it all changed." My voice starts to break.

I don't want to be reminded of what happened again, but I realize that Max is right -- piling up all these emotions will do no good either. I need to talk to at least one person in my life.

When I glance at Max, he's staring at the moon, but I know that he's listening intently, and it's more than enough for me.

"I met Tyler," I say. "We became close friends, and I did realize his feelings for me."

That horrible feeling stirs inside me again. I suddenly feel nauseous, so I take a deep breath before resuming talking again.

"I liked him," I say.

Liked. Or like? I don't know. My heart has become numb since that incident last year.

"But I didn't realize that Rory had the same feeling," I whisper, my voice starting to shake. "Since she was my best friend, and Tyler spent a lot of time with me, the three of us used to spent time together too. I guess that she didn't know about my feelings, or about Tyler's -- she always thought that we were just close friends. I..." I falter, feeling uneasy. "I don't know why I'm telling you about this, Max. You might think that this is annoying or ridiculous--"