The Sisters Of The Court

Chapter 71: Scarlett

A few nights later I in bed with Misha snuggling up to his warm chest as he strokes my hair gently. Thank God he's to important as the Tsars brother to be put in danger. I shut my eyes in pleasure, like a lazy cat. "Tasha." He says quietly and I open my eyes, the warmth of the moment is broken as I see the concern in his eyes. I quickly get up and throw on my robe and sit on his side of the bed. "What is it? Are you ill my love?" I press my hand to his forehead and he takes it down gently and holds it. I can tell there's something wrong, he's trying to let me down easily. "I talked to Nickie while we were there." He clasps my hand in his and I know what it is. I can't and won't believe it. I stand up and go to the window, looking out into the pale moonlight I can hear him putting on his robe and coming towards me. "I have to go, I have to fight for my country." He puts his hands on my shoulders and I shift away, he doesn't have the temperament of a soldier, he's just like another boy that's excited for war. "Let me go with your blessing Tasha." He says gently and I spin around as my temper flares up, Blessing?! "You want me to give you my blessing to get yourself killed?" I let out a harsh peal of laughter, I am to shocked and angry to stop myself from hurling into a fight. "I am not going to be killed you know that-" I can tell he's struggling to control his temper with me but I cut him off. "Know? I don't know anything! A war cannot be fought in a few weeks!" I shriek furiously, how dare he abandon his family, his children to risk his life? He is heir after Alexei! How could Nicholas do this? Send his own brother into battle while he stays in Petersburg! "You are not a soldier Michael! You will be killed and your wife and children will be left with nothing because of your stupidity!" I can't imagine ever losing him , I love him more then I did George and it was hard enough losing him, I don't think I could survive if I lost Michael. "I have had training! My wife does not command what I do or my decisions! I am going as a duty to my country I love!" He yells back at me, I don't think I've ever seen him this angry before, this stupid war messes up everything. "We make decisions together! What will I do when Alice's child is born?!" I yell, He has a family just like Nicholas and I don't see him leaving. "I had hoped to go with your blessing but it turns out you have no loyalty!" He grabs my arm and throws me out of the room, I can't even look at his face without wanting to scream at him, He'll see I was right when he's lying dying on a battlefield, I scoff to myself as I start walking angrily down to a spare bedroom. "Mama?" I hear Nicholas's small footsteps pattering after me and I turn around to find him holding his teddy bear. "My love, what are you doing up so late." I squat down to his level and brush his dark blonde hair out of his face, he reminds me of my Duckie when he was little. I don't know where they get their hair from. "Me and Gemmy heard you and Papa yelling and she went to Papa so I came to you to make you feel better." He says and my bad mood immediately go away, at least I am blessed with sweet children in spite of having a fool husband. "You are so sweet my love, come here." I pick him up and he rests his head on my shoulder, him and Julia are so different, he's quiet while she's loud, like ying and yang I smile to myself. "Are you and papa alright?" He asks as he snuggles into my shoulder, he's as light as a fairy from all the pain he's suffered from such a young age. "We are fine my love, sleep." I kiss his forehead as I lay him don on the bed and go to sleep with my son instead of my fool husband.

I refuse to talk to Michael, even less then usual. I eat in my rooms and refuse to eat with him, I assume he's still angry at me as well but I really don't care. He talks of duty then I will do my duty too, One day after lunch I take my hat and walk to the hospital that has been set up in Dmitri Pavlovich's home. He wants to be a soldier? Then I will be a nurse and devote myself to that instead. "Ah, Grand Duchess." I see Dmitri standing on the street smoking and I give him a smile, "Hello Dmitri." I give my hand to kiss and he kisses it, he's been coming over in the days since we first me visiting me with Vicky and I consider us friends now. "Come to be a nurse I see, your majesty?" He teases and bows low as he ushers me in the door, I look around the crisp white beds and nurses slowly milling around the patients, Russia hasn't entered a battle yet so there are no wounded, But a thrill goes through as we pass the operating theater, I never gave much thought to nursing or to medicine, I always thought it was left to nuns and male doctors. But now, as I walk through this wonderful palace made into a hospital it seems like a pristine wonderland. Dmitri leads me into a small office where a rather lean man with spectacles sits behind a desk. "Dr. Meade, I have a new nurse for you, make sure she gets a position." Dmitri says and kisses me on the cheek before leaving. I observe the man sitting in the chair, He sits tall as if he owns the place, prideful. But Meade is not Russian so he's obviously from England or somewhere in the Isles. "You must be his friend, I'm doctor Thomas Meade." He expects me to bring my hand out for him to kiss but instead I shake it. He speaks with a highland accent that reminds me of my childhood when we would visit aunt Victoria at Balmoral. "Grand Duchess Natasha." I smile and sit down in front of his desk, at once I see his smile falter as he slowly sits down. "Married to Grand Duke Mikhail?" He asks and I see him observing me over his spectacles, I feel my smile start to falter at him observing me but years of being in the public eye forces me to keep it up. "That's right." I say certainly, I don't see what the issue is, I am the Tsar's sister in law, cousin to the Tsarina. "Oh, I am sorry Natasha but I do not think you are what we are looking for." He says slowly and I at once understand his meaning, he must be new to Russia. He thinks me a whore still. "You think I'm a whore." I say frankly, And meet his gaze as he avoids mine. I can tell he is ashamed, but I can tell that's what he's thinking. "I assure you I am very loyal and I can be professional, I also recall the Grand Duke telling you to give me a position just a few minutes ago? I am not the person I used to be." My gaze remains stony on his face as he rises his eyes to mine, I can tell a spark of admiration is behind them. "You can come in tomorrow to start training." I stand up and shake his hand. I walk from the office and back to the motor waiting for me outside.

I walk through the fields as the evening cools and I see Misha standing in the front door. I walk up to him and see him in uniform, he is going now? Would he have gone without saying goodbye? "Tasha." He says as I approach and tears fill my eyes, he looks so brave and dashing, I hate that we had that stupid argument. "You are a fool for going." I try to keep my voice strong but I choke on my tears and he takes me into his arms stroking my hair like he did the night we fought. "Shhh, Natasha I will write you always." He says leaning down to hold so his face is pressed into my neck. "I love you always." He whispers as he lifts my chin to kiss him, we don't need to say anymore as I watch him go holding my white handkerchief as if I was a drowning woman. I watch him drive off into the horizon until I can see the car no more.