The Heartbreaker Agreement

Chapter Thirteen: Breaking Walls

Jaxon walked with me into school that morning. It was hard. Probably the hardest thing I could have ever done. I didn't know where Sarah was and Jaimie wouldn't pick up my phone calls. I'd lost my family and I hadn't told Jaxon a thing about it.

Everyone was staring at Jaxon and I; and I could feel the tension between every different social group. It was so strange seeing people move for me in the parking lot, and watching my hand that intertwined with Jaxon's. Jaxon didn't seem to notice that half the school population was locked in on us, or that his ex-friends were giving us ugly gestures. It was like he didn't notice anyone else's presence except my own.

With all the eyes on me, thoughts dancing in my head of different things that made me squirm.

Everyone knows about the agreement.

Everyone knows that you're lying to Jaxon.

Everyone knows that you're a whore.

I moved closer to Jaxon as he came to the door and held it for me. "I don't feel comfortable," I said quietly as Jaxon just looked up at me and waited for me to walk through the door. "I want to go home again," I said carefully as his arm looped over my shoulders and he had me move inside the school.

The door shut behind him and he sighed before placing a hand on my cheek. "Listen, I know that everyone's staring and that it probably freaks you out but think about it like this...no one has ever seen me claimed as in a relationship." He shrugged it away and I nodded before leaning into the palm of his hand.

"I just don't like being stared at," I whispered and he nodded. Jaxon pressed his lips to my forehead before looking up and nodding ahead of us. I turned to see what he looking at and froze when I saw my painting against the wall.

"I don't really think you're going to have a choice," He said as I slowly walked to my painting and stared at it. I stuffed my hands into the jacket pockets of Jaxon's jacket and stared at my face on the painting. It was still beautiful, encased in a trophy box with light pouring over it and a plaque at the bottom with my name on it and the painting titled 'Inside of Me.'

I stared at the painting of mine in silence as Jaxon wrapped his arms around me and dropped his chin on my shoulder.

"It's beautiful," He said in my ear and I gave a small nod. "Will you tell me everything about it?" he asked. I glanced at him from the corner of my eye and smiled.

"I'll tell you one thing, just chose a part of the image you want to know about."

Jaxon's face nuzzled into the side of my neck and any sense of fear for the day to come or overwhelming thoughts about what he might know...just vanished. "Tell me about the heart," He whispered against my skin and I leaned into him.

It was so strange to have him with me in this way, in public too, but everything felt natural. "My hearts locked up, after being broken so many times, I can't help it, but I keep it in a cage. I want to be able to control the things my heart does."

"I don't see a key," He said, his lips just grazing my ear as he spoke.

"That's because no one needs into my heart, not ever," I whispered as the bell for first period rang. "Let's go to class." I mumbled and Jaxon let me pull away from him. I couldn't look up at his face as I walked with my hands stuffed in my pockets. It felt awkward with him being my boyfriend, to know that I didn't have a key to my own heart.

***

When lunch came, there was a tension between Jaxon and I; we didn't have a said place to sit, but I had a feeling that sitting with our normal friends was just out of the question, and go figure considering it was the only table open. I didn't want Jaxon to sit with his friends since Jaimie had told me that she let Erik in on my horrible doings.