Pain - A TommyInnit Angst

Chapter 6

'Oh thank God you're okay Tommy. How are you doing?'

'Better. I'm on my way to school now.'

'School? Are you sure you're well enough?'

'Yeah, I covered everything on my face so I should be fine.'

'Tommy, maybe you should talk to a teacher about what's going on? They could help you, they could call the police.'

'I don't want the police involved Wilbur. Please just drop it.'

'Okay then.' Wilbur sighed and Tommy could hear it from down the phone. He felt guilty for snapping at him when he knew how worried Wilbur must be, but Wilbur just didn't understand how terrified he was of his parents.

Tommy managed to change the subject and the pair talked about videos and perhaps recording one tonight if Tommy felt well enough. Tommy finally arrived and ended the call, but he felt much better for having talked to Wilbur. It was a nice escape to talk about something other than the current situation. He knew that he should call Tubbo and Ranboo soon, but he just didn't know if he could face it yet. He didn't want to hear the pity in their voices.

Tommy sat down at his desk and waited for the teacher to call his name for registration. But when it was his turn to be called, the teacher looked at him and said 'Thomas, are you okay? You seem to have been injured.' The class giggled slightly and Tommy swallowed nervously.

'Yeah Sir I'm good thanks. Just clumsy, that's all.' He let out a forced laugh, but this seemed to convince the teacher and he continued with registration. Tommy sighed in relief and stared down at his desk.

The day went by all too quickly, and then it was time for the last period; sport. Tommy hated sport, he had never been athletic and he hated it even more when he was injured and in pain. They were given the choice between playing dodgeball or rugby; of course, all the popular and athletic boys chose rugby and Tommy chose dodgeball. Dodgeball was easy; all he had to do was get hit once and then he could just sit on the side for the rest of the game. The two groups separated and went to play their respective sports; as planned, Tommy allowed himself to get hit almost immediately and, letting out a sigh of relief, went to sit on the bench. He felt weak from standing up for so long, and the pain in his back was getting increasingly unbearable. He pulled the hood of his hoodie up and rested his chin on his hands, pretending to watch the game, pretending to care. Eventually, the sports teacher noticed him and came over.

'You okay Thomas?'

Tommy didn't respond and just nodded slowly.

'Look, Thomas, why don't you go back in.'

Tommy began to shake his head but he was cut off as the sports teacher continued to speak.

'Take your hood down,' He pulled Tommy's hood off his head much to Tommy's annoyance,

'Roll your sleeves up, it'll make it easier to catch and-'

Before Tommy could stop him, he'd pulled up one of his hoodie sleeves. The teacher stopped in his tracks as Tommy's skeletal, scarred arm came into view. Tommy quickly yanked his sleeve back down, pulled his hood up and faced away from the teacher. He could feel tears pricking his ears, and silently cursed at himself for allowing this to happen.

'Thomas. Are you okay?'

Tommy nodded.

'Why don't you go and-'

'I don't want to talk about it.'

The sports teacher hesitantly stood up and left Tommy alone on the bench. Tommy allowed the tears to leave his eyes and they fell fast, dripping onto his hoodie.

As soon as the lesson ended, he grabbed his bag and walked straight out of the school. Most people changed before going home, but Tommy couldn't change in front of people with all his scars; he normally changed during lunchtime in the loos, but they were always full at the end of school.

He kept his head down as he walked home, staring at the pavement, his eyes blurred with tears.

Tommy kept his head down as he arrived home, and to his relief his parents weren't there. He walked briskly up the stairs and sat on his bed, reaching into the draw of his dresser to get the blood-splattered silver blade that lay there. He took a deep breath, rolled up his sleeve and pressed it against his skin.

Breathing heavily, he made the first cut.

Then the second.

The third.

The fourth.

The fifth.

The sixth.

The...