Blindsided

Lullaby

me, a fanfic writer: *pets Ruv's hair and whispers* Imma fuck you up, bruh.

Love and air-kisses to my darling beta Dotemms! Song for this chapter is Stolas' Lullaby (You Will Be Okay) from Helluva Boss Ep. 2

Chapter pic from Emily on Twitter!  https://twitter.com/_Emily0w0_/status/1390517763228278786?s=20

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  After evening Mass and dinner Ruv sat with the kids while Sarv was doing paperwork for the church. He had a small arsenal of knives spread out in front of him and a whetstone with a bowl of water, and the soft shushing of metal on ceramic was a pleasant white noise when combined with the sound of turning pages and scribbling from the kids laying by the coffee table.

  Ruv thumbed the blade of a small stiletto knife, checking for burrs. He rarely killed anymore unless it was a threat against Sarvente or food, but he liked to keep his equipment in order after breaking his sickle against Sarv many years ago. As he flicked the switch to retract the blade and moved on, the motions putting him in a meditative state, his memory wandered back.

  He hated how he used to treat Sarv back then. Hated himself deeply for how he'd argue with her, his words clipped sharp and aimed to cut at her deepest insecurities that he for some reason could read like an open book. Hated himself for how he'd scarred her body when the arguments turned physical, blood dripping from cuts that started to heal before his eyes. Disgusted himself with how he mistrusted her and took out his anger with the world on her.

  Not that she didn't give as good as she got. His back still itched from time to time from the scars, the vestiges from the excruciating pain of a white-hot holy cross burned in his flesh during one fight. But though she always seemed to reach the end of her rope with him, fraying her nerves and triggering her to crack open the black gates of Hell to cow him, she'd never once kicked him out or left him behind. He didn't think she had it in her to betray anyone.

  She could scar him, tear at his psychological walls, rage at him with hellfire and a holy sword, but he'd forgive her until eternity. She possessed him body and soul, his only friend in a world of twisted cruelty that treated him as worse than dirt. He would follow her to the gates of heaven or the inner rings of hell. He trusted that home would always be where she was. She would never leave him.

  So lost was he in his musings that he didn't notice Sarv had entered the cloister until she was standing behind him, putting her hand on his shoulder and gently rubbing his back over the puckered scar tissue. He leaned into her touch, hungered for its tenderness in a way he'd never felt capable of wanting to be touched by another being.

  "I'm sorry, Sarv."

  She leaned down. "You don't need to apologize to me. Never to me."

  He watched as she wandered to the children, exclaiming over their work and praising Ras' perfect map of some arcane schema that went over his head. He watched, and the kindness and joy on her face settled deep in what was left of his heart like a flame.

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  He was woken by the sound of thunder and crying. Whipping himself up, his eyes frantically found Sarv beside him, practically dead to the world in sleep. Another bolt of lightning lit the room and he leapt from the bed and out the door, stopping in the entry to the sitting room.

  The children were clinging to one another, panting heavily as a summer storm pelted the windows with the fury of nature. At the sight of him they darted to his sides as another crack rent the night in two.