LEMONADE 2||

Chapter 36: Nobody But YOU

"Yup and I'll continue to date until I find a man who is truthful, loves and respects me-

"I DO LOVE AND RESPECT YOU" Ricky yelled

"And what does your ex have to do with me wanting to leave? She asked. "Don't play dumb your still mad and you want to punish me for it. My life is on the line, my family's life is on the line but you wanna throw a temper tantrum because I had relations with my ex? You're a piece of work" he said

"Your life is always on the damn line. Nobody is throwing a temper tantrum I don't want to be in your presence and yet you're parading the fact that you slept with your ex almost if you want to make me upset because I'm upset typical narcissist" she said

"Or you going on a date to get a reaction out of me" he added

"Ricky this doesn't even correlate, nobody was checking for you, you think you're the greatest nigga out here because you have status and are untouchable so what? I understand you have a lot going on but I won't let you paint me out as being crazy for feeling how I felt.

"That's not what I'm doing-

"Yes it is, I just stabbed a guy for Christ sakes" she scoffed

"So," Ricky said. Josie rolled her eyes "I'm doing things I'm not even supposed to be doing-

"I told you to come with me, had you listened instead of trying to be a hot girl none of this shit would have happened" he stood up raising his voice. "Excuse me? So now you're blaming me because some niggas are after you?

She laughed "This isn't even about your dad it's about me going on a date" she shook her head. "Nah it's bigger than that, it's the fact that your ass can't cooperate... ever at the end of the day whether you like the circumstances or not you tied to me and you need to act like it" he said. "Oh please stop the macho man talk I'm not trying to hear none of that... you know what instead of us arguing you need to be real for once in your life and tell me what's going on.. and just maybe I might be a little more understanding-

"That shit that just happened wasn't understanding enough? He yelled. "You're talking in circles and just wanna be mad about shit" he grabbed his lighter.

"And you're still not communicating with me, just like back in the day," she said sitting on the edge of the bed. "There you go living in the past it never fails," he said. "RICKY YOU LIKE TO LEAVE ME IN THE DARK AND I HATE IT" she yelled. It grew silent again the both of them filled with passion and hurt.

"....Fine, again I'll do something you'll never be able to do .....is to drop my damn ego. Yes, I'm a little hurt about what happened between you and your ex, and it's not really the sex... it's just... it was always somebody else and it made me feel some kind of way. Ricky, I've always been your #1 fan even when you didn't deserve that kind of appreciation. I get it you know, I get that I'm not the main person in your life and you had a life way before I got in the picture. I understand our journey it's complicated and I would never make you feel bad about mourning your ex. I believe she was a wonderful woman... but it's the things you said. How we never had anything? How you weren't cutting her off for me. I was like wow so what am I to you? Was I just this girl that helped you get over that little hump you had.. then later down the line, you decide to give it a try because it's time to "commit to something" hmm? Was it Dreux or Craig constantly drilling in your head that "I'm a good girl and you never let those go"?

Ricky shook his head not saying just listening. "I've watched how you loved women your mother, your sister, and when you got so aggressive about your ex Lauren that's when I realized I wasn't shit to you. I didn't even ask you to cut her off. I didn't ask for shit. I just wanted clarity, I've always wanted clarity. But most importantly I wanted to finally feel like I was your one and only you know all those times when you commented wifey under my pics and how I'm your world. I wanted you to back it up but you didn't.. you just disregarded my feelings and made me feel like shit" she said. She began to chuckle "The only person you care about is your family, your ex, and Morgan. I'm just the "good woman" that got away.. and I don't deserve to be that" she said.