regret

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Close your eyes. Take a deep breath. Pretend to be the girl that today I'm gonna show you. Ok now we can start. It's not easy to be alive, when everything you do is wrong. You are skinny? skin and bones. You are fat? whale. You wear make up? omg you use too much make up, I bet that when you take it off you don't recognise yourself. You don't wear make up? Well you should wear it because it makes you more pretty, it covers your imperfections, don't you wanna be pretty?. You are an introvert? you are so boring, you never talk. You are an extrovert? omg stop talking, you're being too loud. You get good grades? Nerd. You get bad grades?   Dumb. You get medium grades? mhhh, you could do better. You wear a dress that finishes before your knees? You just want attention. You wear a dress that finishes after your knees? annoying. You wear oversize things? If you wear them it means that you don't wanna show how fat you are, gross. You are part of the lgbtq+? It's a phase, you are just confused. You aren't part of the lgbtq+? basic, ugh, you're not trendy. You're not rich? you can't sit with us. You're rich? ugh daddy's money. The truth is that you're never gonna be appreciated by everyone, there's always a person that is gonna say that you're not enough. The only moment when you have a little bit of peace is when you're dead.
"OMG WHY SHE DID IT?" because you judged her.
"omg she was so pretty" you told her to put make up because for you she wasn't pretty enough.
"OMG I loved her, she was so sweet" If you loved her so much, then why you never allowed her to sit to your table at lunch?
"she was such a great student..." but you always asked her to do better, even when she did her best.
"I can't believe that she did it" You also couldn't believe when she told you she wasn't straight, because you told her that she was trash and that she deserved to die.
"She was such a good friend" She never had friends.

Regret.

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Thank you for reading this.

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