I Love You Most

Chapter 1

Olivia Torez, 23 y/o

I sat on the couch, scrolling through the millions of options that Netflix provided for me. My mom had finally let me be on the internet, of course, with restrictions that go all the way to hell. We've always had TV and network providers and such, but last month, I got my very own phone for my 17th birthday. Mom figured that if I were in danger or absolutely needed her while she was out, she could only be a quick call away. The sad thing for me, though, was that my mom was my only contact.
I sighed and clicked on The Office once more, rewatching it for what felt like the 50th time. My house, I've come to realize, was basically a prison. A prison with good food, TV, and restricted internet, but a prison nonetheless. Looking at my phone, I considered just going online without Mom knowing. But if she knows how to put all these restrictions on my phone, she has to know how to know if I'm breaking those restrictions, I thought to myself with a disappointed sigh.
The internet seemed like an amazing place. On all the TV shows I watched, all the teenagers had social media like Twitter, Instagram, and of course Snapchat. That seemed like a popular one. I just wanted to be a normal teen as much as I could. I'd always be homeschooled, and not allowed to go out without Mom right next to me at all times, I couldn't change that. But maybe if I got social media or some sort of thing that wasn't restricted on my phone, I would get that sense of normality that I longed for.
"Dwight, you ignorant slut." The TV said behind me. I huffed in frustration. Maybe if Mom saw my point, she'd allow me to get just one social media? No, I thought again. Mother has always been strict. Social media? As if, the thought of it made me laugh. Mom agreeing to a website that literally had almost everyone in the world logged in? No way. She barely, if at all, let me talk to anyone.
"Flower?" Mom called out. "Come help me with the groceries," I hopped up from the couch and began shuffling in the groceries from her trunk, putting them away in the fridge and pantry when I was finished.
"That show again? How many times have you finished it now?" Mother chuckled to herself, shaking her head as she shut the pantry door. "I was thinking we could make cupcakes tonight, how does that sound Olivia?"

"That sounds great, mom." I smiled at her, looking down and taking a breath. mom furrowed her eyebrows, noticing something was on my mind. "What is it?"
"Nothing."
"Come on, Olivia, you know I don't like it when you do that. Maybe I should just take away the TV, you're reflecting the behaviors those teenagers on TV do. Being moody doesn't make you a teenager, you know that, right?" She scoffed. "We've talked about how you can speak to me. Now speak."
I swallowed, a lump in my throat appearing as my mom shamed me for not wanting to talk. I didn't want the one thing that made me happy sometimes to be taken away, so I began to talk. "Well, I was just thinking, a lot of teenagers have social media. You know, instagram, facebook, snapchat... All that stuff. And, since I'm not really a normal teenager, maybe that would make me a bit more normal?... I promise I'd be good on it, I'll make a fake name so no one will even know it's me. I won't even post anything, I swear!" I watched my moms face for some sort of reaction. Anything?
"Snapchat, huh? You know, when I was your age, we didn't have any of that stuff. We just played with the toys we had or went out into the backyard, and that was that. I'm raising you to not be dependent on screens, you hear me?" I sighed and watched my mom kick her shoes off and set down her purse. "You know I love you. I do this for your own good," She kissed me on the forehead, smiling at me. "We'll talk about it."
My eyes lit up like a christmas tree, a huge grin forming on my face. "Thank you thank you thank you, mother! Oh my god," I hugged my mom as tight as possible, the smile on my face not wavering. "Of course. I'd do anything for you if it made you happy. Now let go, I can't breathe." She chuckled, and I quickly got off of her and ran back into my room to be happy over there.

That night, my mother had finally allowed me to get one social media platform: Instagram. I was absolutely over the moon, and probably would be the rest of the week. Hell, I'd go as far as saying the rest of my life. Scrolling through Instagram, I found some posts about some of the things I was truly passionate about. But the thing that I gravitated towards the most were the edits and posts about minecraft- specifically these youtubers that played minecraft while 'streaming', was the word they used. I didn't know what it meant, but I liked the sound of watching someone play minecraft. They seemed pretty popular, and I liked reading about them.

My mom said that the rules for the social media was that I needed a fake name, and I wasn't allowed to post any pictures of my face or any personal information at all. And I was absolutely not allowed to talk to anyone at all. I didn't care though, at least I had it. And like mother always told me, just be grateful for what you have and not upset about what you don't. It usually followed with don't be a brat, but I decided to leave that part out of the mantra for now.

(93,283 likes, 3729 comments)
Quackity.HQ you guys are poggers.

It followed with a picture of him and his cat, Tiger. I found out some information about this certain streamer. He was around my age, if not a year older. He played minecraft a lot, but also did other streams like watching telenovelas and playing roblox with his friends. He seemed funny, and nice at the very least. I decided to comment.

Olive._. What does 'poggers' mean?

I immediately got replies back, blowing up my notifications on my phone.

Pogger.GirlxX what do you mean what does poggers mean KSDJAHKJSA

Delilah_innit it just means like good, or something. Like, woah thats poggers. Lmao. dumb.

Sapnap.Fangirl BRUH SAKJFSAK fake fan. That's not very poggers 😳😳😳

Pheebs.Live guys, stop hating on the poor girl. She's probably new to the fandom. If i'm right, welcome olive. :)

The last comment left for me made me smile a bit. At least there were some nice people online. But then I started thinking about messaging Alex (which was Quackity's real name, I'd discovered). I knew he wouldn't respond, he most likely got millions of DMs a day. Why would he single me out? But it'd be fun just to see how DMs work and not get in trouble for having a conversation with someone. I'd delete it right after.
I clicked on the message button and began typing what I wanted to say. "Hello Quackity. I've been looking at your posts for a little while now, and noticed that you like minecraft too. I'm new to instagram, so I don't really know how this works, but I like what you're doing. You seem to make plenty of people happy doing what you love, and I think that is pretty cool. Yours truly, a fan."
I remembered not to sign off with my name. I was breaking one rule, but I didn't want someone to show up to my house randomly just because I gave them my name. I sent it, and turned off my phone. Deep down I knew he wouldn't even see it, but I kind of hoped he would. He seemed nice, and getting told nice things every once in a while, I found to be comforting and motivating.

"It's time for bed!" mother called, walking into my room and sitting on my bed. "Did you have a good day today?"
"Yes." I smiled, laying down and looking up at my mom. "It was probably one of the best days of my life."

"Good, my love." she moved my hair and kissed my forehead, "well, we'll wake up in the morning and have an even better day, right?" Mom gave me a small smile before getting up and going to the door. "Sweetest dreams," she whispered, then shut the door.