VINNIE HACKER // imagines

:; nothings the same anymore

⚠️ TW: this chapter involves serious subjects such as self harm and suicide. if these subjects make you uncomfortable, i advise you to not read this chapter. i love you all very much. this is your warning (if i have forgotten to mention anything else PLEASE let me know) ⚠️

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Why?

Why did Vinnie have to go and fuck everything up? We were perfectly fine for all I know. We loved each other. Didn't we? But he still did it anyway.

flashback:
"Hey Michael! How are you?" I greet cheerily as I put down the bag of groceries.

"I'm doing well, how about you?" He responds, looking up from his phone with a smile.

"Fantastic, thanks for asking."

I place the groceries away and then grab my keys and bag and make my way up to mine and Vinnie's shared room.

I walk past Kouvr and Alex's room and the door was slightly ajar. Kouvr was sat on the bed nervously biting her nails. She must have heard me, so she looked up with a shock over her face and ran to the door.

"Y/N come here, I need to talk to you right now," She rushed out.

"Uh, ok," I giggled uneasily.

She grabbed my arm gently and pulled me into the room. We sat on the bed and she started to mumble.

"Huh?" I asked.

I couldn't hear a word she was saying.

"I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this but...," She stopped for a minute to compose herself. "Vinnie's cheating on you."

She pulled me into a tight hug and I just sat there like a stunned mullet.

"Uh wha- what?" I questioned.

I felt ill. All joyous thoughts that I had before had now faded.

"He came back with a girl and as soon as I saw her I confronted him but he brushed me off so I knew that I had to be the one to tell you because you're one of my best friends," She replied her voice full of sorrow.

"I'm gonna go to his room and confront him," I said looking up at her with teary eyes.

"I'll be here for you if you need me," She responded sincerely.

I got up from the bed and walked back out to the hallway and down to our room.

"Fuck Vinnie!" A shriek came from behind the door.

Moans followed after it. I screwed my eyes shut and pushed open the door. All the noise stopped abruptly and I opened my eyes. There he was on top of some girl. She could have passed as a Victoria's secret supermodel.

"Y/N-" he began.

He got off of her and put on his underwear. I just shook my head. The girl scrambled for her clothes and began to leave.

"I'm so sorry, he never told me he had a girlfriend, I- I- I'm sorry," She said wholeheartedly.

"It's not your fault," I replied with tears falling down my eyes.

She looked back at Vinnie and put the finger up at him.

"You're such an asshole! You shouldn't cheat and if I knew you had a girlfriend, I would have beat the shit out of you!" She yelled at him before exiting the room and slammed the door.

"How long?" I asked.

My voice quivered and I look at him with sore eyes.

"Uhm, a month," He whispered, loud enough for me to hear.

"Were you ever going to tell me?" I questioned again.

He looked guilty. He couldn't even look at me.

"We're done," I said with confidence in my voice.

"No please, I can fi-"

"No," I began. "You can't fix what's already been broken. That's how love works, it's kinda like glass for that matter," I softly spoke. "I'm gonna grab my things and go."

I walked to the closet to grab a bag and I started to pack the essentials that I need. My back was toward Vinnie.

"You can't keep it all inside, you know? Bottling it up won't do any good so please yell at me. Tell me I'm the worst person ever. Please, you're scaring me, I'm worried for you. Yell at me, slap me, do something," He let out.

His breath was ragged.

"No, I am not going to yell because I do not have the time nor energy for that. You've made your bed Vincent, lay in it," I replied, my voice full of hatred, yet it kept that same softness.

His anger towards himself got the best of him and he let out, "I enjoyed fucking her you know, she was better than you, so much tighter."

I had everything I needed so with one more pained look in his direction I walked out of his room with my bloodshot eyes and messy hair.

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I had arrived at a small motel about thirty minutes from the hype house. I was going to spend my night there, seeing as I won't be here tomorrow.

⚠️TW:

"It's now or never," I whispered to myself as I turned off the tap to the bathtub.

I stepped into the tub and grabbed the razor. The stingy sensation welcomed me back and I drew deep cuts all over my arms and thighs. Memories of my past flew before my eyes. The smile I wore everyday was my facade, so that the world didn't know how I truly felt and what Vinnie had done was finally my tipping point. He was my everything but all good things come to an end. My vision began to turn black and there was nobody there to save me.

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present day:
There he is, sobbing uncontrollably on his bed. I sat there watching him, he didn't know but I was there. All I was to him now was a spot of cold air, a spirit that stuck by him. Even in afterlife I still loved him somehow. He was everything to me and now here he is, locked in his room crying with a photo of me beside him and my favourite blanket wrapped around him. He made his bed, now he must lay in it.

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A/N: i hope this didn't make anyone uncomfortable. if you're struggling with mental health issues, please remember that you are loved and valued, even if you don't feel like it. i myself have struggled with mental health and know that it's one of the worst feelings ever. reach out to someone, whether that be family, friends or a professional, it may really help. i am also here for anyone that needs someone to talk to, you are valued, loved and important!
as always, lots of love
-A