Give Me Truths || l.s

chapter 22

Spring is just starting to breathe life into the city when everything starts to go wrong.

Louis keeps making it a point to pick Harry up after the class he shares with Thomas, but no matter how often he sweeps the boy off his feet, it seems to help less and less. Thomas still trails along too close to him, Harry still feels tense beneath Louis’ fingertips for hours after. Louis asks -he can’t stop himself from asking- but he never pushes. Harry would come to him if things were too bad.

Right?

It doesn’t take long for Harry to spill. He isn’t made for keeping secrets, after all. “Thomas is starting to… he’s getting really creepy,” he mumbled to Louis one night. Their tea mugs are empty and he’s curled his gangly limbs into a ball pressed to Louis’ side.

“Creepy how?” Louis asked, ever gentle.

“He keeps saying things. That aren’t… erm, appropriate. And I keep telling him not to, I swear, but he just…”

Louis’ stomach is starting to give its trademark Thomas Reaction, a mix of nausea and fire and sinking and turning that is all too familiar. “What kinds of things? It’s okay, you can tell me. I want to know so I can help you, if I can.”

Harry doesn’t want to. It’s written all over his face. He does, though, because this is his Louis and there’s probably nothing that he could ever say that Louis would use to hurt him. That much he knows. “He wants me to come back to him,” Harry confesses shakily. “He says he can be better than you. And he says I want to, which I don’t, I swear-”

“I know, baby, I know.” It isn’t anything that Louis wasn’t expecting. He still feels sick hearing it. “What… what exactly has he said?”

The thin line of Harry’s lips pressed together remains sealed for a long minute. “It feels sick to repeat it.”

“You don’t have to. Of course you don’t,” Louis assures him, rubbing big, soothing circles into Harry’s back. “It’s okay. You’re alright.”

“He wants me to suck his cock,” Harry continues quietly, more bravely than he feels. “He keeps asking if his is bigger than yours, if I like his better. And he says he could suck me off, too, cause he knows I always wanted that.”

“It’s okay,” Louis whispers. He’s talking to Harry, too.

There are a few quiet minutes. “I would never cheat on you,” Harry says, even though he doesn’t have to. “I would never go back to him. I would never even think about it.”

“It’s alright if you do think about it, though,” Louis has to force himself to say. It’s the right thing to say. He doesn’t want to say it.

“What? What are you talking about?”

“He was your first love, it’s… it would be normal, if you were tempted. To go back. I would understand if you thought about it.”

Harry sits straight up like he’s been struck. “Louis- I would never-”

“Well it’s not like I want you to go back to him or anything, I just don’t want you to feel bad if you’re like, conflicted or whatever.” The shock doesn’t leave Harry’s wide eyes, and Louis feels his heart tugging at him to relent. “Nevermind, baby,” he sighs at last. “Forget I said anything, okay? You’re alright. We’ll be alright.”

It’s sort of his mantra from then on out, whenever Harry’s face gets pinched and sad, or when Louis’ mind starts racing with a list of all the reasons why maybe Thomas might seem better than him. More money. Handsome. Athletic. Popular. First love. Has his own place. First love. Strong. First love.