The Perfect Luna

a walk to the past

And what if I were to be the Luna of this pack once more? I stopped myself, I refused to entertain the thought. It was impossible. Archer and I have too much tangled strings to work out once more. Too much things has happened and too much time has passed.

And besides, I don't even know how he feels towards me. I have rarely seen him during my current stay. The last time I conversed with him was that time I accidentally met him at the stairs.

Sure, I would see him from afar talking to some pack members or to Allan or Derek, but when I looked away and looked back, he wasn't there anymore.

I always ate with the pack and they always prepare me a feast even if they were probably having a hard time finding good ingredients with lands being contaminated and all, but still Archer never came down and although I was tempted to ask, I didn't.

Thinking of all these things, I found myself in front of our house. Well, it was Archer's, but even if it was for a short while, it has also become my home.

As I stared at it, I was saddened by the fact that it looked so empty and dark. It looked like a house for rent. It wasn't the house full of warmth and comfort that I've come to known.

I suddenly remembered the very last time that I was here, the last conversation I had with Archer, the rejection, the goodbye. I also remembered the miscarriage, I remembered the loneliness and anger I felt back then.

And suddenly, my heart was breaking once again. However, no tears fell.

I had cried way too much for the past year, I don't think I have any tears left to cry.

I wondered if Archer was inside, but I couldn't catch his scent anywhere, in fact his scent was very faint, as if it only lingered.

Although it took courage, I forced myself to revisit the house. The place I had once called home, the place I had once looked forward coming to, the place where Archer and I built our relationship and the same place where we destroyed it.

When I turned the doorknob, I was glad to find that it wasn't locked because I wouldn't have the keys.

Walking inside, I was shocked to find the furnitures all draped in white cloth. It looked like an abandoned house from the outside and even more so on the inside. The counters at the kitchen collected dust, other furnitures had cobwebs.

One more thing that surprised me is some furnitures that looked like they were slammed on the ground. Some lamps and vases were broken on the floor and so I had to be careful with my steps because I was only wearing sandals.

It was cold and empty and in such a big house like this, it felt even more so and then it dawned on me.

Archer doesn't live here anymore...

That fact was clear and obvious, his scent can barely be traced. It's as if he left this place a long time ago. But why?

After my shocking tour, I mustered more courage to go upstairs. I walked up the staircase, each step slow and hesitant, but I found myself in front of my old room. The room that I used to be in when I first arrived, before sharing one room with Archer.

I was surprised to find my clothes all intact in the drawers. If I remembered right, in my anger, I made a mess in trying to take as little baggage as I can on my way back to my home pack. The room should've been a mess, but it wasn't.

Like downstairs, the tables and chairs were dusty, but it was nonetheless kept clean.

After visiting my old room, I stood in front of the door of our old room.