One Day They'll Know Your Name

Clubs dont need names

"Harry!" Harry just snorted quietly.

Lockhart stood in the center of the dais, Professor Snape glowering from as far away from the blond man as he could get while still on the platform. "Welcome, students! I am here to teach you the joys of dueling! And of course, you know my lovely assistant, Professor Snape. We will demonstrate a typical duel, and then we will split you up into pairs and let you attempt to duel as well! I promise to return your Potions Professor in one piece!" With the last sentence, Lockhart threw out a wink, which several girls giggled at. Harry gagged.

"Now, to begin, you take your wand and salute each other, like so... then you bow. Turn and take five steps, then get into position. On the count of three, one, two, three!"

With a flourish, Lockhart tried to cast a spell, but Professor Snape was faster. "Expelliarmus!" Lockhart's wand flew in one direction, while Lockhart himself flew in the other.

My Sssalazar could teach better than thisss idiot, and he'sss been dead for a thousssand yearsss.

Harry coughed, not having expected Salmissra to come out near the Great Hall.

For that fact, I could teach better, and I'm a thousssand year old fifty foot sssnake.

Harry choked, but didn't answer. Draco sent him a concerned look, and Harry just muttered "Later," under his breath. Draco nodded and turned back to the front as Lockhart attempted to teach a shield spell, only succeeding in a strange wiggling motion, and dropping his wand.

Lockhart turned to the group of children. "Now, I'm going to separate you into pairs, and you will duel each other." He proceeded to list off the pairs, including Hermione and Millicent Bulstrode, Ron and Ernie Macmillan, Neville and Justin Finch-Fletchley, and Harry and Draco. The room exploded into chaos, with Hermione and Bulstrode holding each other in a choke hold, Neville hopping around the room, and Macmillan a bright pink. Professor Snape's wand let out a loud bang and everything stopped.

Lockhart took control of the room again and had the pairs do a duel one at a time, switching them up. Harry didn't pay much attention until Hermione's name was called, and he noticed she was paired with Pansy Parkinson. The duel started well, both witches seeming relatively evenly matched. Then Parkinson cast a spell Harry didn't think he had ever heard.

"Serpensortia!"

An adder grew out of her wand and headed toward Hermione. Harry gasped and began shoving his way to the front of the crowd. He heard Salmissra hiss in concern from the wall nearby. Harry reached the front of the dais just as Lockhart said, "Don't worry, I'll take care of it!" and instantly started worrying. He was proven right as whatever spell Lockhart used just threw the snake into the air. Harry threw himself onto the dais and caught the snake as it was coming back to the ground. He could hear Ron facepalm behind him. He wondered who had taught him that. His attention snapped to the snake in his arms.

What isss happening? What am I doing here? Harry hissed as unrealistically as he could, and Salmissra got the hint.

Hatchling, the human holding you can Ssspeak, but mossst of the other humansss around do not realissse thisss. My human hatchling will take care of you.

"Lapikoa," Professor Snape hissed. "What is the meaning of this?"

Harry turned to his Head of House. "It was either catch the snake or possibly have it land on someone who's deathly afraid of snakes and have it bite them."

The snake in his arms began hissing again. It isss cold, Human. Harry hurriedly cast a warming charm around the snake.

"Can I keep him?" He turned his puppy eyes onto the professor, and the older man sighed.

"Fine, but we will be having a discussion later today. Detention tonight at eight."

"Yes, sir."

When they finally reached the Slytherin dormitory, Harry began talking to the snake. I am sssorry I couldn't asssk before, but are you male or female?

I am male.

Do you have a name? Mine isss Harry.

I do not have a name.

Could I give you a name? There isss alssso another sssnake in the dormsss. Her name isss Sssulu. Her Human is Marcusss Flint.

You can give me a name. I would like to meet thisss other sssnake.

"Flint, our newest arrival would like to meet Sulu. Could you bring her out?"

"Sure thing, Parsel."

What do you think of the name Jormungandr? It isss the name of a large sssnake in Norssse mythology that sssurroundsss the entire world.

Jormungandr isss an acceptable name.