Altered

Forty-Nine: Some Life

Finally James halted, beneath the shade of the tall pines, his footsteps muffled by the blanket of needles under his feet, running his hands through his white blonde hair. He turned around and looked at her for a moment, before gritting his teeth and shaking his head. "Come on and keep up," he grunted, impatiently. Charlotte half smiled walking to his side. They continued the walk back to the school in silence. The trees began to thin and the land underfoot became more even. The sun had descended below the horizon, leaving only a lingering light in the west. Some of the brightest stars were already making an appearance in the mauve coloured sky. Charlotte could hear the call of gulls and the distant crash of waves on the shore.

"I don't know what to say," James finally said. "I don't know where to start".

"Neither do I," Charlotte muttered. "I thought I knew but now... The game doesn't even seem clear anymore". James sighed heavily and looked up to the sky.

"You were really good today," he said finally. "I had no idea you could affect so many people with the projections. That's why I doubted them at first everybody else was seeing what I saw. It misled me," he explained.

"Thanks, but I wouldn't have been able to do that today without your help in the first place. And Ethan seemed to know exactly how to execute the attack - it was his idea, pushing the boundaries of my alteration," she said slowly. How was everything so awkward? Surely they were past that by now.

"Ethan of course - always focused on the win," he sighed a little too tensely for Charlotte's liking. "Charlotte..." he said quietly after a pause. She didn't want to talk about the game. There was only one thing on her mind. And she was sure it was the same for him, or at least she hoped, but at the same time she wished she had never kissed him. She wasn't sure what had made her do it. She wasn't sure about any of it. She had just been so suddenly caught up in the idea that it had been only him and her in that world and he had seemed so perfect... and the adrenaline had been coursing through her veins, giving her courage, making her fearless. She groaned inwardly, furious at herself for being so impulsive. But that was textbook Charlotte, reckless, acting before her brain had switched into gear. Why can't I think about anybody but myself? Maybe he hadn't wanted to kiss her. It made everything complicated, everything distorted. Everything seemed more difficult now.

Charlotte realised James had fallen silent, thoughtful and worried. This only compounded her feeling of stupidity. How do I leave him free of this? She couldn't have this awkwardness lingering over them with the patrons watching. They had to be a team. And yet she wanted to kiss him again. She wanted to feel his lips against hers, his arms tightly wrapped around her, her fingers knotted in his hair. She wanted him to want that too.

"Whose fear did you use?" he asked finally. She shook her head, ridding herself of her selfish thoughts. He had other thoughts on his mind. Charlotte flushed, knowing he would only be angry with her.

"Elmhirst's," she breathed, trying to sound confident, though she knew she was failing. He stopped, grabbing her hand and pulling her to a halt. He glared at her, his face unreadable.

"Why?" he asked.

"Because... It was the only one that would allow me to do that. He's afraid of us - afraid of me. He doubts his own reality, because of what I can do. I just showed him how easily he could be misled, how easily his reality could be taken from him. It's why he hates me so much. You said it yourself - he fears me," she said slowly, willing herself to sound stronger.

"And now what will he do?" he asked, plainly, raising his eyebrows. His tone was one of vaguely concealed frustration, his green eyes clouded. Charlotte knew by his expression that he already knew the answer. She pulled her hand petulantly from his grip, glaring at him.