65 - Let's love each other, that's all that matters

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Sanem

We were all in shock, I understood that in that moment I had to be strong, I couldn't burden Can, but rather stay close to him in such a delicate moment of his life.

We left Mihriban's villa walking slowly, embracing each other in the silence that followed the storm, our restless souls guiding us towards the sea, which has always been a source of consolation for both of us.

We sit on the planking of the pier, Can welcomes me in his arms against his chest, we remain in a silence that is caress and support for both of us. In this moment we need only each other's presence.

The peace of the night, the sound of the waves, the discreet light of the moon and our hearts beating close together are all we need. We stay several hours like this, hugging each other, not talking, then get up to go home and lie in the darkness of the bedroom again, wrapped around each other, looking for the support and comfort we need.

The days that followed were not easy, together we slowly found the strength to process this terrible event.

What had happened had overshadowed our little miracle, we hadn't been able to experience the excitement of the news together.

I asked Can to join me at the new creamery in my neighborhood after work, the necessary maintenance has already been completed, we are waiting for the furniture and will be able to proceed with the opening soon.

We need to distract ourselves and this new adventure allows us both to take our minds off the oppressive thoughts of recent times.

I close the door of the laboratory and take him by the hand.

- Come, I have something to show you -

We head towards my parents' house, Mevkibe hugs us happy to see us, I drive Can upstairs, he follows me curious and amused by my obvious enthusiasm.

I look up and Can follows my curious gaze, with the hook I catch a ring in the ceiling and as if by magic a trap door opens, I hook a retractable iron ladder that I pull until it touches the floor in front of our feet. I look at him smiling slyly, he is surprised and amused.

I invite him to follow me and begin to climb up, he waits until I've reached the top before starting to climb in turn so as not to overload the small ladder. I don't turn on the light, wait for him to get to the dark attic.

- Are you ready? I have a surprise for you -

I turn on the light and watch him intently to scan his reaction.

His eyes shine with joy and emotion, he reaches out a hand to hold me close hiding his face in the crook of my neck. He whispers softly into my hair in a broken voice:

- With all that has happened we couldn't even appreciate the wonder of what is happening to us, once again I have failed you, I have allowed my problems to overshadow such a special moment for you and for us. Forgive me Sanem -

- What are you talking about, don't be silly. These days couldn't have been different from how they were, it's normal to need time to assimilate certain events, I absolutely don't want to hear you talk like that anymore, you don't have to have remorse of any kind.
I came this morning, pulled it out and set it up for you to see it in all its glory.

This is my newborn crib, I would like our son, or daughter, to sleep his first sleeps here, what do you think? Do you like the idea?

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This is my newborn crib, I would like our son, or daughter, to sleep his first sleeps here, what do you think? Do you like the idea?

-Oh Sanem, how can I not like it? It's beautiful and I'm in love with the idea of our children resting where their beautiful mother rested-.

- Our children? Because how many do you intend to have? We've never really broached the subject -

She hugs me teasingly laughing - If it depended on how much I wanted you I think we would have to do a lot of logging around our cottage to make room for the additional rooms we would need for all our children -

- Caaan! What are you talking about! -

- You don't know how ecstatic I am at the idea of this baby, I'm so happy, it's a dream come true, the crowning achievement of our immense love, I hope it's a little girl with mom's eyes and smile -

- And I hope it's a baby as beautiful as daddy, how do we do it? -

- It doesn't matter, we'll have to work on it until we're both happy, what do you say? -

- Caaann!!!- I smile amused by his words.

He stops and looks at me for so long that at the end I feel almost embarrassed - What? Why are you looking at me like that? -

- I'm admiring the most beautiful sight I've ever seen in my life, not even the views of the highest peaks or the most beautiful stretches of water I've seen in my many travels have moved me as much as your smile Sanem does. To think that I almost lost you...-

-Shh, don't think about that.
Let's enjoy every moment together, let's live the beautiful experience of becoming parents, let's love Can. That's all that matters, nothing else. Tamam?

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