It has been exactly three months since Harry and I really had seen each other. After what happened, he and I decided to just stay friends and hang out sometimes, still doing some things we both love to do but weeks after that, the schedules were just piled up and that was it. I didn't get the chance to see him anymore.
Today since I'm home, Mom is coming to see me and asked if It was okay to film and I didn't really mind so I told her that she can bring our crew in. Not even an hour after she texted me, she came in with our old crew following right behind her. They gave me my mic before they started filming us at my living room.
"How was your work in France?" Mom asks casually as she stirs her cup of coffee before bringing it up to her mouth to take a sip. I sigh, as my head falls onto the backrest of my couch.
"I'm so tired. Like I've been sleeping since I got here and the more I sleep the more weak I feel. I really don't understand." I tell her as I stare at her again.
"Well maybe because it's not really relaxing to you. Try do some other activities sweetie, maybe you'll feel better." She advices and I nod my head as I listen to her.
The went on with just Mom and I talking about a lot of important stuff. She and the crew left as soon as they got a good amount of time from me. Honestly this show is just about how we live everyday. Mom and I would just talk like the old times and they're there filming it.
I was scrolling through my phone, just bored from how messed up I am right now. I asked my assistant to go and buy me some donuts and thanked her before she went out of the house. I have been craving it since I was in France.
I laugh at some memes, sometimes it's about me or my family memes that cracks me the most. It's just so relevant most of the time and people would always talk shit about me and my family and we didn't really give two shits about their opinions.
my face falls flat as I came across a photo.
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I knew that man who's back was facing the camera so well. It was a post with a caption of a red heart from a woman named Helene. I don't know why but it made me really sad to know that he has already found someone else. I mean, that's probably the number one reason why he hasn't reached out to me and I've tried multiple times but sometimes I wouldn't be able to send any messages considering i'm not home in America.
As bad as it sounds, I stalked Helene and found that she was accompanying Harry as he tours. That probably made him liked her as she was always with him.
I felt jealous, I felt sad, I felt mad. I know that I don't have any right to be but he could've at-least told me that 'hey I got a new girlfriend already.' even if he tells me to fuck off, It would be fine with me.
But he didn't and that really hurts my feelings because I love him and still continue to love him even if we've been off for almost four months now. I just don't understand how fast he could move on from what we had. Again.
I sigh turning my phone off as I threw it on the other couch. I really don't need this right now. I don't need anything that will affect me and my job. I can't let that happen anymore.
He knew that my work also revolves around touring, just like him but still very different. But the reason behind his new found love life really makes me feel like shit because it seems as if I wasn't able to give him time when all I did for our relationship before was to try and try to see him every single time I was home or could see him even just on a video call, so he knows that I miss him greatly and am dying to see him.
It just sucks because I know we aren't together anymore.
