ドラブル - 𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘪𝘵𝘢𝘯 - ⁽ᵈʳᵃᵇᵇˡᵉˢ⁾

𝚘𝚗𝚎 𝚕𝚊𝚜𝚝 𝚏𝚊𝚛𝚎𝚠𝚎𝚕𝚕

*heavy spoilers of the chp 139 (final chapter)

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she loved him

never once did her feelings falter

even when he blew those spiteful words, laced with the most agonising of poisons, into existence.

her faith in him prevailed through it all.

to her, he was still the same young boy who itched to seek justice and peace for him and his friends - even if that meant watching the world crumble under the weight of its sins. she watched as armin woefully lamented that eren hadn't been able to formulate an adequate argument for why he subjected humanity to the destruction of the rumbling. 

he knew, all his comrades knew in the back of their consciences, that he didn't need to - his ambitions and values shaped his every action. even as he stumbled through his brief time on earth, he never stopped striving for the intangible concept of freedom despite realising that right from birth, his broken wings would forever remain clipped until the day that death left its mark on him, he was disabled from soaring in the sky as a being that wasn't confined by the twisted rules of society. 

he insisted that he hated slaves even though he was the very thing which he looked down on with the utmost malice and disgust - his mere existence crafted just for the sake of repentance.

wrongly he was endowed with the title of 'humanity's last hope' instead he constructed the road for someone more befitting to become the 'saviour of the eldians'. the world was rid of the entity which plagued the minds of everyone, the things which scarred the eyes of many, seized the lives of innocence and brought immense discrimination to this already divided place in the universe. 

whilst the existence of them may have been abolished - the memories still have an everlasting presence on those whose minds like to haunt them with taunting snippets of their lives. 

their origins remain unanswered and are a question that some wonder, others try their best to forget as the titans are no longer needing to be a worry anymore - this was the start of a new era.

mikasa could never eliminate her times with him although that meant reliving the horrors of the war countless times. the precious boy who wrapped the scarf around her was worth fighting enemies to the end of the world and back. 

if you told anyone who knew the pair that she would be the one to finish it all in one single, effortless slice - they would just scoff and call you a liar. it was unfathomable to believe that the girl who swore the boy whom she owed her life to, the exact same girl who had always put her own life on the line if that meant ensuring that his life wasn't treading the path of danger, would be the one to eradicate his presence.

every year without fail she comes to his grave and weeps silent tears, they tasted bitter-sweet as the world around her became more vibrant and alive since he left. the air felt lighter and warmer, with the gentle breeze cruising through, but it still didn't surmount enough to fill the gaping hole in her heart that only he could complete. 

the birds chirped joyfully as the lady clutched her chest, heaving with aches of yearning. she hated him for leaving but was indebted for the things he did for the rest of the island. her neck bare and exposed for the wind, which had seemed pleasant before, to stroke her with an icy chill. 

some days were better than others, in the day joy overtook her as she walks the street with those who had stayed through it all but when the moon came out and darkness overtook the sky - that's when the loneliness creeps in. 

she missed him but she had never felt freer because of him. everyone was now freer. 

if only he could experience this is what she thinks with a little smile. 

when she closes her eyes sometimes her mind envisions his eyes from childhood which held a determined glow as he weaved between the streets, other times she likes to conjure up scenarios of what could have happened if he didn't have to go. would they have gone on walks by the sea? they would stay peacefully in a little cottage, happily growing old together or maybe they would have travelled beyond the water and discovered more about his father's unknown past?

whatever would have happened, she just knew that he would have finally been able to fly as high or low as he desired and for as long as he wished to.

as much as she dislikes to hold regrets within in her, selfishly she wishes that they could have had one last kiss where each other's feelings were reciprocated and he wasn't acting by the rules which he had laid out for himself, instead he let his raw emotions dictate his next move.

however, she leaps forward confidently, treasuring the little but thoughtful interactions which they had together throughout the years and she hopes that a time comes where she is able to let go and soar as he does now. 

at least she can move on knowing that

he loved her too.

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i still can't believe that aot is actually over..

thank you isayama :')

- serai