Poetry and Short Stories

S | You are my star

"There is a lonely star within the galaxy. Its light doesn't reach far, and its existence doesn't get noticed by many. It glows the best it can, it tries the hardest it has, but it never seems to be enough. At times, it even thinks about burning out.

I open my hand and the star comes falling down. Gently, it places itself on the top of the palm of my hand. I am afraid to move, I am afraid I will crush it by even breathing. So, I hold my breath and stare at it in fear.

The crumbled-up pile of paper in my garbage bin is the result of disappointment and perfectionism.

I have a love and hate relationship with my own passion. It makes me burn on the inside and makes me fall down a well with dark water.

It's an opportunity that I shouldn't take for granted.

I try.

I try, I try, I try.

I tried.

I try.

It isn't because I don't want to, it's because I just simply can't."

She looks up from her notebook and stares right into my eyes. My heart flutters as she raises an eyebrow. "And?" is what she asks me. She puts down the pencil and looks over the text she has just written down.

"I think it's beautiful, especially the beginning about the star. I kind of wish you continued talking about the star instead of introducing something new."

"Hm," is all she answers me with. "I can see why you think like that, but I want the poem to like 'reflect my own mind', if you get what I mean."

Her blue eyes make me think of the ocean and how I want to take her there.

"I mean, I want it to be chaotic."

"It definitely is," I tell her. "Just like most of your poems."

She looks up at me. Has she ever realised that I am attracted to her?

She closes the notebook and puts it in her bag. She drinks up the lasts sips of her coffee and gets up from the chair. "Are you going to come too?"

I nod and take my cup from the table.

As we walk outside through the busy shopping street, I imagine us walking on the beach during a warm sunset. Instead, we're in a cold and rainy city where cigarette smoke hits your nose and people constantly bumping into you.

We get to a small bench and we take a seat there. My hands are cold and I try to warm them up in the pockets of my jacket.

"Look," she says and she points at the sky. Above us is a galaxy filled with glowing stars. "If you look closely over there, you will be able to see the herdsman. Do you see the big, bright star? That's the Arcturus."

"How do you know all this?"

"I read about it."

I turn to her and watch her as she watches the stars. When she notices I'm not looking up, but that I'm looking at her, she turns her attention towards me. "Hm?"

"I-"

The stars look down on us as we move closer to each other. When she pulls back a bit to look at me, she whispers to me: "You are my star, Joshua."