The Not-so Happy Ending | ✓

Chapter 33

I give him a hesitant nod, not wanting to make him feel uncomfortable or myself and after that he walks away as I stare at his retracing figure.

I close my room door and walk into the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror and only then did I realise how bad I looked. My cheeks had dry tear stains on them, my eyes were red and puffy, my dark circles under my eyes somehow are more dark and visible and my nose is red. Don't even get me started on the bird nest that rests on top of my head that is also known as hair.

I sigh at myself before turning on the tap and washing my face with cold water to reduce the redness of my face. I then tie my hair in a ponytail and straighten the wrinkles in my t-shirt before walking out of my room and downstairs for dinner.

I make my way into the dinning room where everyone is sitting. I see Ethan and I feel my heart stop for a second. His hair is disheveled as if he ran his hand through it multiple times. His eyes are rimmed red like mine and his shirt is wrinkled. He is serving himself and I know he has sensed my presence in the room as his body stiffens for a second and his hand stills on the serving spoon he was holding before he continues serving as and pretends he didn't just notice me.

"Amelia dear sit down!" Mary gushes as she proceeds to make me sit down. I notice that David is missing and just as I am about to ask, Jullie says. "David had a night shift at the hospital. He won't be coming for another few hours."

We all nod before we eat in silence. I think people around us noticed the weird tension between me and Ethan, especially Jullie. She kept glancing in between the two of us as if waiting for something to happen. But nothing did. The usually flirty comments, the blushes, the smiles, none of it happened.

I hear Jullie awkwardly cough and I remove my focus off my plate to look at her. "Is everything alright... Between the two of you?" She asks. I look at Ethan, who is already looking at me intensely. "We broke up." He says all while keeping eye contact with me.

I hear Jullie coughing and choking and my head whips in her direction. Her face has a look of disbelief as she is looking between the two of us all while Mary is patting her back the same expression on her face.

"W-What?" She asks after a coughing fit. "Things... seemed... God I don't even know." Ethan says as he plays with the contents on his plate. I look down not knowing how to respond and thank god no one says anything after that.

After the awkward dinner all of us mumbled a 'good night' before scrambling off to our respective rooms.

I walked into my room and closed the door. And looked around and only then did I notice what a mess it was. My bed was unmade with a few books scattered on it and my closet was open with a few clothes on the ground.

I sighed and put my hair up in a messy bun before starting to clean. After cleaning my whole room I jumped onto the bed and just started at the ceiling. I knew for sure that there was no way in hell I was sleeping without Ethan, he was like this source of my sleep that I needed close to me just so that I can sleep. He gave me this sense of... love and comfort.

For the next few hours I tried to keep myself busy, with reading random books, even re-reading and just watching stuff on my laptop before I sighed and gave up. Now I was just sitting on my bed staring ahead, wondering how in the world do I fall asleep?

There were too many thoughts running in my head, all of which had something to do with Ethan. So then I did something I thought was never going to happen. I took out a piece of paper and started writing those letters I wrote.

Yes, those letters I wrote to the people I loved. I never thought I would make another one. But here I am making one for Ethan.

In the letter I just write down whatever I am feeling and how overwhelmed I am. I feel free while writing... As if there are no restrictions.

I just sat there writing, my hands working on their own accord and before I knew it, it was morning. The sun was rising slowly and my eyes were tired, I picked up my phone and saw the time. 5:56 am it read. I sighed, folded the piece of paper and carefully put it in the blue folder before going to the bathroom.

I washed my face, took a long shower, brushed my teeth and got ready for the day. Just as I was putting on some lip gloss my phone pinged. I furrowed my eyebrows wondering who would text me at like 7 in the morning. I opened the notification and saw it was a message from Madison asking if I wanted to hang out at the mall with her for breakfast.

I replied with a sure before turning off my phone and working on my hair. I looked at my outfit, it was a pair of blue ripped jeans with a hoodie. Ethan's hoodie may I add.

It smelled like him and somehow just made me feel safe. I know we are broken up and that I should probably give him his clothes back, but... Just but. Yeah, I have got no excuse.

I walked downstairs and saw no one was awake, I decided to go for just a walk to clear up my mind and wrote a note telling them I was going out for breakfast and won't be back till later and stuck it on the fridge.

I was supposed to meet up with Madison by 9 so I just walked around the neighborhood. I was feeling better than yesterday, I felt more alive. Yesterday was just dreadful. I stopped walking when I came across the neighborhood park and I went and sat down on the swing. There wasn't anybody here, it was just me and the wind.

I sat there with my eyes closed and just thought. I thought about how things may have been even a little bit different if my father told the truth to my mom long before. I thought how things would be if everything was fine. And lastly, I thought about whether breaking up with Ethan was a good decision or not.

I did what I thought was right. A part of me wanted to listen to Ethan, I wanted to fight for us, but another part of me just wanted to give...up.

I sigh and look down at my phone to check the time. 8: 55. I better start walking to the mall if I don't want to be late.

I walked to the mall and met up with Madison. Everything seemed to have gone by in a blur for me. We went to a small restaurant, had pancakes, window shopped a bit and talked and then boom before I knew it we were back on our way home.

We were talking about a history assignment as I opened the door. We walked in and into my room and then I returned all the stuff she had lent me. God, I kept it for long.

We talked for a few more minutes before she had to leave. I walked her to the door and I bid goodbye to her and was about to walk to my room when my eyes connected with Ethan's.

He was looking at me instantly, with a look of hurt and emptiness in his eyes. We kept eye contact for a few minutes until I broke it and hurried to my room.

My heart was beating so fast that I wouldn't be surprised if it jumped out of my chest. Ethan's eyes image kept running through my head and I can't help but hate myself for making him feel like that.

It was not only him, even I was feeling empty and hurt.

God, I screwed up so bad.

Now I guess I try to fix it.