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˜"*°•.˜"*°• chapter 20 •°*"˜.•°*"˜

【ｄａｙ　４３】

tsukishima pov

It's been about a month since ... well ... that. The time that I was laying down on my hard floor, suffocating on my own thoughts. If I'm being honest, it's happened a couple times after that. It actually happened just last night. It's terrifying going through that, especially when I don't know what's happening or why. I tried looking it up, and it just said that I've been having panic attacks, which is something that happens to someone who has anxiety. My only question is how I would have gotten anxiety. I mean, yeah, I've been a little more on edge ever since she told about her past, but why would that give me anxiety? Maybe I can ask Tadashi...

I actually get out of bed and head to my closet to get some clothes before I head to the bathroom to shower.

After about 15 minutes, I walk out of the bathroom, clean, clothed, and ready to go. I decided that I was just going to get breakfast at the convenience store. I was too lazy to actually make anything. I walk over to the front door, put on my shoes, and pick up my bag. I yell to Akiteru that I was leaving as I close the door behind, making my way to the store.

After the relatively short walk, I go inside and meander through the aisles filled with snacks. I go by the sweets section and stop. I look down and there are strawberry shortcakes on the bottom shelf. I bend down and stare. Suddenly a memory pops into my mind. The time she had strawberry shortcake at my house.

"Hey! You okay l/n? Why are you crying?"
"I-I'm fine. You don't need to worry about me."
"I'm going to worry about you, and you can't stop me from worrying."

"Hey." A voice snaps me out of my thoughts.

"Huh?" I look up to the owner of the voice. "Oh. Hey." I stood up, towering over her like I always do. I look into her beautiful (e/c) eyes, and, like always, I calm down and feel myself relax at just the very sight of her.

"Um... I didn't get to eat breakfast this morning..." She said quietly. She's keeping her promise... A smile was permanently growing in my mind at the thought of her keeping her promise to get healthy. Even with her state of mind, home life, and social life. She's making an effort to get better, and that made me happy.

After she had said that she didn't get to eat, she kind of spaced out. I tried snapping her out of it by calling her name, but she was so deep in her thoughts that she couldn't hear me. This doesn't feel right. I don't want her to start overthinking anything.

"Y/n! Hey! Y/n! You okay?" I ask as she finally comes back to the real world.

"Huh? Oh sorry. I guess I just spaced out." She said, her cheeks becoming sightly pink. She's not getting a fever, is she?

"It's alright. Is something on your mind? Do you want to talk about it?"

"Oh no. It's nothing." It can't be nothing.

"Alright. Anyways... what do you want to eat?"

"Oh... um maybe a strawberry shortcake?"

I just smiled and nodded. She likes strawberry shortcake too... That's what really brought a smile to my face. I thought back to the night that I wanted to eat some with her. Now I know that she might enjoy it too. Maybe not because it was with me... but at least she would like what she was eating.

I bought the shortcake for her and we walked to school together. We just... talked. It was nice. I'm pretty sure I was smiling like an idiot the whole time. Luckily, y/n never said anything about it, so I'm just assuming that she never noticed. I'm just glad that, whatever that feeling is, didn't show up when I was walking with y/n. I would have been so embarrassed if I just up and started freaking out about nothing. She would think I'm such a bitch. God, why am I such a fucking idiot?

It feels nice that I don't have to pretend to be some self-absorbed, punk around y/n. I can just be... myself.

"Your plushies are really cute."
"Please don't talk about those. I don't want you making fun of me for it. I only have them because my dumbass brother won't let me get rid of them from when I was kid."
"Mmhmm... I think you just love them so much that you never want to get rid of them. They're like a symbol of who you are. What's your favorite food?"
"Why should I tell you, shorty?"
"Because I know you want to."
"Strawberry shortcake."
"That's it then! You are... a salty, strawberry shortcake loving dino!"
"Salty? I'm not salty."
"Um Kei. Have you met yourself? Obviously not."
"Hey! I am not salty! I just don't like people. They're annoying and full of shit."
"So you think I'm annoying and full of shit?"
"You are annoying, but I don't consider you a person. I think of you more as a small shrimp."
"Hey! I'm not that small!"
"Yes you are."
"You should smile more."
"Why?"
"You look good when you smile. You look happy. Whenever you're insulting someone or you're 'being yourself,' you don't look satisfied. You just look... what's the word... bored! You look bored. Like you don't care at all about what the other person is doing. Like you're only doing it to keep a reputation."
"So what?"
"You should just be you. The real you. Not the you that makes fun of people just to make yourself seem tough and brooding."

"Hey... where's Yamaguchi? Don't you usually walk with him?"

Oh shit.

*time skip*

Practice had finished early that day, I was planning on asking y/n something. I've been wanting to ask her this since I found out about her home life.

"Hey. Um... do you mind if I walk you home?" I ask.

I groan in my head, thinking about how she may say no or she might get mad at me. I'm being too paranoid about this.

"Y-Yeah... sure." She replied shyly.

okay sooo first... THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR OVER 2K READS!!!! i never would have expected this story to get that far.
next... i am currently in a different state for a volleyball tournament... so i may or may not be able to update. i will do my best to update as much as i can, but my mental state is kinda all over the place. hopefully i can get one posted next week. again thank you so much!! i hope enjoy the rest of the story to come!!