Slayer of Time (Demon Slayer X OC)

Chapter 16: In Love?

"Wait!  Mizuki!"  Akane states as she gets up and tries to reach for my hand.  Turning around as I head to the door.  I bow once more.  "I'm really sorry for snapping like that.  I don't want to become a bother to the two of you right now.  I think I should organize my feelings before anything else.  Thank you for today, I'll visit again."  I state quickly, giving the two a small smile. 

With that I pick up my sash and head out of their house.  Briskly walking to the front of the yard where I left my bamboo and wood pieces, I grab it and make my way towards the forest.  

I can't express how confused I feel at this moment.  I feel....confused, upset, angry, and sad.  All these emotions are mixed and bubbling inside of me.  That warm feeling each time when I think of Michiktasu resurfaces and makes my heart hurt.  "Love??? Seriously love?? I don't even know......."  I mumble to myself as I rub my eyes. 

Entering the forest and following the river going deeper into the forest.  Finally stopping at an opening and dropping my belongings down on the ground.  

Slouching against a tree, I close my eyes as I feel so conflicted and confused.  "Am I really in love?"  I mumble out to myself.  Just sitting there under the tree with the occasional chirping of the birds ring out.  

This feeling....It makes me feel all sorts of emotions towards Michikatsu.  But, I never would've thought that this could be love.  There's nothing for me to do with this feeling anyways.  He's gonna get married to Kira Ochiro and their gonna have a family.  

I clench my fists together at the thought as my heart begins to ache once more. Sighing out as I open my eyes and stare at the clouds moving and the leaves from the trees sway with the breeze.  "Why does everything have to be so complicated.......I need to let these feelings go.  I can't have them, they will only cause trouble for Michikatsu and his new life ahead."  I mumble out as I reach out to the bamboo and wood. 

Pulling out a small pocket knife from my sash, I start to cut some pieces off to make a training sword.  

"It would be nice to talk to Sarah...She would've helped me through these feelings."  I state as I try to carve out a handle.  

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"Hahhhh."  I sigh out as I plop down on the ground covered in sweat.  After spending hours in the forest making my own training sword and practicing by myself.  Wiping my sweat off my forehead, I look up seeing that the sun has already begun to set.  

"Hah.  Love...I still can't get that off my mind.  But if it's not like I can ignore them forever.  I can't just keep avoiding them, so I'll just have to face them on."  I state to myself as I clench onto my chest.  

I know no matter what, my heart and myself will end up getting hurt.  But it's not like I can stay here in the forest and get killed by a demon.  Getting up and picking up all my stuff, I start heading back and exit the forest. 

'I wonder if they even cared if I was gone the whole day.  Will Michikatsu and Sato-san be sad that I wasn't here?  Will they be glad that they got rid of me?' 

'I feel that these feelings don't just encompass love but the affection from my family.  I miss so many things and to be honest I'm exhausted.'  I think to myself as I trudge my way back 'home'.

Each step feels heavy as I continue to walk and my stomach growls slightly.  Shifting my items, I hold onto my stomach.  'I probably need to cook myself something and leave it in the kitchen'

Finally standing in front of the gate of the Tsugikuni household, I push it open and peak in seeing that no one was in the front yard.  Sighing lightly, I push the gate open and walk in, closing the door behind me.