The One Who Tried to Kill me

Studying his Face

My eyes slowly opened to see Bucky's face next to mine, his eyes were closed and he looked peaceful. I was nervous for him to wake up. I knew we were going to have a difficult conversation that starts with me crying and ends with him killing Loki. I know he cares about me more than anyone, he loves me, but how could you keep something this important from someone you love?
He began to shift in the bed, causing me to hold my breath, hoping he wouldn't wake. Without opening his eyes he reached his arm around my waist and pulled me into his body. How could I be so in love with this man, and at the same time want to kill him? He nestled his head in my hair a bit, making my stress wined down a bit. I took a deep breath and turned towards his face again, taking in all the little details. He had stumble on his face, he likes it because he thinks he looks like a baby without it. A strand of his hair was placed delicately on his cheek, and for the first time I noticed a tiny scar under his left eye that was hardly noticeable. I lightly traced it with my finger.
"That's from you, you know," he spoke in a groggy voice still not opening his eyes
"From when?" I said shyly
"Back on that highway, when you were battling Hydra. . . And me."
"Oh."
"You were able to rip off my glasses."
"Yeah . . ."
His eyes opened slowly to meet mine.
"I'm so sorry," he started "I was- I was gonna tell you."
"Why didn't you?" I asked trying to keep my emotions hidden
"Steve told the team it wasn't the right time."
"That's it? You kept the biggest mystery of my life a secret because Steve told you to?"
We didn't break eye contact
"I- I almost told you a few times, but you were already going through a lot."
I flipped on my back so that my gaze was at the ceiling.
"Can everyone stop treating me like a child?! Yes, I got shot. Yes, I took down Borris. I'm a big girl! I can handle the truth!"
He grabbed my hand
"I know. I know you can. I just hate seeing you overwhelmed." He started caressing my hand with his thumb "when you came in last night crying, it broke my heart. I was trying to stop that from happening."
"Well how'd that work out for you?"
He stayed silent
"I just thought after telling you how I wished I knew my parents. . . After telling you I love you, you would want me to know."
"I did! I did so badly y/n!" He sat up and leaned over me, causing eye contact again, "I must have begged Steve 100 times!"
I stayed silent and studied his face a second time.
"I wanted nothing more than to hold you and tell you! I was going to tell you the night Sam barged in."
I just kept my eyes locked with his, filling the room with silence once more. His eyes soon roamed all over my face, taking in every detail I had showing. His thumb lifted to my cheek.
"I love you y/n! You are the one person I can't live without and I shouldn't have been such an idiot," He caressed my face, "I should have told you, and nothing like this will ever happen again."
"It better not, unless you want another artificial arm." I finally said
He grew a small smirk
"I'm still mad, but I forgive you. It might take me a while to feel ok with it but I don't want to waist more time staying away from you, because honestly it's torture." I spoke again
He leaned down and kissed me
"God, I love you!" He said grinning
"I'm glad, and I need you to remember that when I tell you this next part. . ."
"What?" His eyebrows scrunched
"It's about Loki . . ."
"Did he make a move on you?! I swear to god-"
I placed my hand on his chest to calm him down
"Let me just tell you."
He took a deep breath
I began to fill him in on the events of the previous day. I told him about my research, talking to Steve, and my confrontation with Loki. His jaw was clenched and his eyes were cold.
"He- he's delusional smiles! I mean that's crazy!" I said trying to calm him down
"He is delusional! He's not- your MY girl!"
"Yes I am, so there is nothing to worry about!"
"THAT LITTLE- that little creep!"
He stood up with his fists clenched.
"Buck, don't-"
Before I could talk to him he was walking out the door.
____________________________________Thanks for reading!❤️