Keychains ✔

I

Tai shifted from foot to foot. He stared at my heels. "It's making you uncomfortable. That makes me worried. Talking about it helps. I want to understand, Nora. Why run away? Why cut all communication with them? That's...that's like..."

His distress cracked my heart. "Say it, Tai. I've heard it all before. It's unnatural, selfish, rude. I don't regret it. Some families are just different. Distance is healthy."

I angled my face away from his so he wouldn't see my anguish. But Tai was like no one I'd ever met. Instead of meeting my eyes like he was trying to gouge out the truth, he played with his keychain in his hands. The keys made snap-click-snap sounds. They spread apart and came together with his fingers like a mechanical flower, and before I could remark it was a neat trick, he balled his hand in a fist.

"It's sad," he finally said. "And this feeling...I'm not good at recognizing it but I feel sorry for you. I would try to reach out again. Family's important. I think you care too, deep down. Because--well I don't know Nora. You talk about all these aspects of your life here, and then your family is like this blank space I don't even know about you. It's hard to connect when our interests don't overlap. I don't know what I'm doing wrong," he sighed finally.

"It has nothing to do with you," I said, my soft words bordering on exasperation.

The lamppost hummed. Stray leaves whispered against the grass. What was a relationship without communication? What kind of relationship was this if I couldn't be honest, just like the way my parents treated me?

He said it a moment before I could. "C-Could we take a break?"

"Okay," I said, with a quiet exhale. "I think that would be good, for now."

We retraced the path we took, all the way back to the downtown core. Tai's humming evolved from a simple melody to a complicated, jittery tune. Finally we reached my condo. The warm lights from my condo's lobby promised me comfort and rest. Arching my neck up to the windows of the sixth floor, I discerned Meabh's feline silhouette. Her tail waved in recognition.

I turned to face him. I took a deep breath, afraid the act would shatter the tension and let it leak out to the world. As usual, he avoided my gaze, preferring to look at my shoes. Behind him he had parked his car, waiting to be driven back to Kingston, two hours away from my town.

"We'll keep each other's contacts?" I asked. "Until we see each other again."

He nodded, seeming relieved. "I don't think I'll text anymore, then."

"Oh. Right."

"...Is this a break-up?" he asked carefully.

"No. I hope not."

"If it's not, I figured it would be appropriate to state my opinion." He rubbed his neck. "I think it's important to keep in touch with your family, you know? My family isn't perfect. A lot of times, they don't understand me. My sisters, they'll say things that are hurtful. Even if they call it a joke. But my parents did a lot for me. Think of it as roads in a city. They're connected in some way, and there's dead ends and sometimes things aren't built right, but there are shortcuts. People find ways to build around it. And I think that someone like you can do that, Nora. Find a way without running away."

If harsh words dug deeper than skin, then this was the crushing blow. But I looked at Tai and, impossibly, found the sincerity I was looking for. There was a glimmer of truth. My parents. Their daughter. Reuniting. I'd forgotten what they've looked like at this point, and I had fossilized those people into the worst they have done to me.

I gave the slightest shake of my head. "That sounds nice. And I'm sure that's true for some people. But I can't. Thank you, Tai. Let's meet again sometime."

He nodded, got in his car, and drove away. Not one of my previous dates had come back, and I wondered if he knew that too. I'd refrained from using my power, but even with his keychains, it wouldn't tell me anything new about myself. There was no use learning about someone if in the end, you barely know yourself.

I rode the elevator up to my floor. Meabh meowed from the inside of my apartment. I smiled; she must have heard my keys from the hallway. I unlocked the door and scooped her up.

"Have you been waiting for me all night?" I asked, stroking her head. She purred, then jumped out of my arms and headed to her empty food bowl. "All right. I'm hungry too."

Note: "Meabh" is pronounced as Mayve, like the month May but with a v at the end. It is Irish.