Now You See Me

Nine: Trafalgar Square

"So you'd rather have nothing of him at all?"

"I haven't got nothing of him," I said, "I've got more than enough. That's what I'm saying."

I heard Leia move away, but continued to stare at my feet because I didn't need to see her glaring at me. I deserved it. I was ashamed of it. But I still wanted the barrage to stop, because the more I remembered, the more I would realise I'd lost.

I wasn't ready for that.

"So you wouldn't care if I did this?" Leia asked, and I looked up. My heart quickened when I saw her dangling my photo album out of the window, held by just two fingers. She feigned dropping it, but to my relief caught it again.

"Don't," I whispered. "Don't do it."

"I thought you didn't want to remember any more," Leia said, smirking, and in that brief moment I hated her. "Your body language is saying something very different."

"Just don't drop it," was all I could say in response. "Please."

I didn't know Leia very well; for all I knew, she meant it.

She pulled the album back inside the room and closed the window. Clutching it under one arm, she came back towards me and stood before me, a calculating look in her eye. The album was thrust into my hands and I clutched at it desperately, even though I realised I hadn't ever been in any danger of losing it.

"You should always remember, Damien," she murmured, walking past me to the door. "Don't lose sight of that."

-

"You going somewhere, Damien?"

I looked up from tying my laces as Courtney stopped in the hallway in front of me. I'd heard her laughing and chatting with Thea when I came down and had hoped to slip out without her noticing, but it looked like that wasn't happening.

"Not far," I said, standing up and checking my pockets for my keys and a couple of other things. "Just getting a bit of fresh air."

"Oh, okay." She frowned, and handed me my jacket off the hook. "Do you want anyone to go with you? Lorien hasn't been out in a while." She must have seen what I thought of that idea from my expression, and stumbled to correct it. "He's no trouble, honestly. He'll leave you to it if you need to be alone. It's just... He doesn't leave most days. He hates going out on his own."

I didn't want to imagine the looks I would get on the tube while travelling with Lorien, but Courtney seemed desperate and I couldn't turn her down when she was looking at me like that.

"Fine, yeah. He can come," I finally said, trying not to sound too annoyed. "He's okay on the underground, right?"

"Oh, yeah." She waved a hand. "Thanks, Damien. I'll go get him."

She disappeared up the stairs as Thea came to lean against the doorframe. She smiled at me, and in the darkness of the hallway, her pale eyes weren't as perturbing as usual.

"How's it going, then?" she asked. "Got your head round the transition yet?"

"I haven't actually been thinking about it much," I said, and realised that I really hadn't. "I've been...distracted."

"Courtney said," Thea replied. "But I suppose, as far as transitions go, the Syren one is pretty gentle. Vampire and werewolf ones are horrible. All drawn out." She visibly shuddered.

I didn't really want to talk about it, so I steered the subject away from those waters. "As long as I remember to take a bath regularly, I'm fine. I expected it to be more traumatic than that."