𝖺𝗌𝗌𝗎𝗆𝗉𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌 || 𝗌𝗒𝗄𝗄𝗎𝗇𝗈 𝗑 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝖿𝖺𝗇𝖿𝗂𝖼

stay open

TW: BREAKDOWN, SELF HARM

y/n pov

after searching and searching for a place to live, i finally found one that was affordable and a good size.

i'm thankful for everything that rae has done for me, i'm so happy that i got to spend a couple of months with her and her friends... and sykkuno.

well, anyways, time to start packing my bags. tears began flowing down my eyes as i threw clothes into a suitcase. the clothes i didn't want were put into a box, i'll bring them to a nearby goodwill.

knock, knock. "uh, one second," shit. why did someone have to be here right now.

"y/n, were you packing?" sykkuno asks on the other side of the door, why was he here.

"i'm leaving," i reply, "i can't keep causing you guys pain."

"you're not causing us pain! you're making the pain feel better! you're the only person to ever actually like me by the first impression. you're the only reason i'm still here and i- you cant leave."

"i'm sorry sykkuno, its done."

he runs into my room and hugs me, we stay like this for a second. so, i hug him back. i don't let go. i felt so comfortable in his arms, i never wanted to leave this. but, i had to. if kyle could see us right now, ah, i'd love to see his ugly beat-up face right now, watching us.

"i'm gonna go now," he said. i watched as he exited room, he turned around slightly.

"goodbye, sykkuno."

"no."

"no?"

"no," he rushed over to me and cupped my cheeks with his hand. he connected us with a kiss, a beautiful kiss. it was like i melted into it because we fit together like puzzle pieces.

he brought his hands to my back and down to my waist. he pulled me into him. i ran my fingers through his hair.

he bowed out of the kiss, "are you still gonna leave?" he asked, innocently.

"i already bought the place." i was red in the face. this time, i wasn't imagining him kissing me, he really did it. it was romantic. it was beautiful. it was perfect.

"you can sell it again," he was desperate at this point, it was kinda cute, "i'll help you," he grabbed my hands, "or, you could move in with me."

{HE HAS HIS OWN PLACE IN THIS}

"with you?"

"yeah, i mean, i'd love the company."

"sykkuno... i just-"

"think about it."

"okay," i kissed him on the cheek, "bye."

"bye, y/n."

5:18 PM

i knocked on rae's door, i needed her opinion on this.

"come in!" she called, she was streaming i think.

"are you streaming?"

"nope, just playin'," phew.

"can i talk to you?"

"yeah, yeah. just gimme one sec."

"okay, i'll be in the living room," i gave her a smile even though she couldn't see it, she was very focused on her game.

i walked to the couch and sat down. she never came.

20 minutes.

a hour.

3 hours.

then i received a text from her.

rae: sorry talk tmrw?

me: yea it's all good! ik how busy you are. talk then :)

rae: k

k? that's it? was she mad at me?

i walked back into my room to see rae sitting cutely on the bed, "you're leaving?" she asked.

"um- i don't know," i started biting my nails.

"well know," she said angrily and walked out. i could tell she was glaring at me without even looking at me.

"oh my god."

i put my hands on my hand and took them down and shook them. i couldn't bottle up my feelings anymore and after doing that for so long, this is the result. "ahh!"

i was definitely hyperventilating now. it was not good. but, the next thing i did, i knew i'd regret. i walked over to my bathroom and opened a drawer. i reached for a small container filled with silver blades and carefully took one out. damn. i didn't want to do this. it was just sort of something i inhabited during my childhood of nightmares.

i soft dug it in my wrist and spread it across, blood emerging from the slit i created.

the pain.

the angst.

the love.

the hate.

i took everything out on myself, cutting.

a second cut.

tears flooded from my eyes and blood flooded from my now 3 cuts. i dropped to the floor and rae came busting in. i guess she heard my screams of pain. she grabbed a cloth and covered the cut. she reached for her phone from her back pocket.

everything was in slow motion and blurred as i saw rae press a few buttons. that was the last thing i saw until- wait, was that sykkuno?

my eyes were now fighting to stay open.

812 words :D

ILY ALL SM
1.39K VIEWS ARE YOU SERIOUS?!

tysm i luv each and every one of you, drink some water, eat some food, stay alive pls :) ily

~annah