𝖺𝗌𝗌𝗎𝗆𝗉𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌 || 𝗌𝗒𝗄𝗄𝗎𝗇𝗈 𝗑 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝖿𝖺𝗇𝖿𝗂𝖼

kyle

TW: GRAPHIC DESCRIPTION OF ABUSE, RAPE, AND SELF HARM.

everything was gone for a second.

my memories all flooded back into my head.

kyle. sykkuno. rae. everyone else.

i remember kyle hitting me, and sykkuno wanting me to come over earlier than everyone else. i also remember rae and i talking about sykkuno and laughing together over the stupidest things.

i remember kyle drunkenly proposing.

i said no.

he then dragged me into the bedroom and ripped my hair back. i vividly remember him pinning me down and taking his belt off. i can see him tying me up and i feel the ligature marks forming on my wrists and ankles.

i suddenly cannot move.

the world is collapsing around me and i can't escape.

then he enters me.

i'm screaming.

he's moaning with pleasure. sadistic bitch.

too fast.

too rough.

that was the first time he raped me.

i'd managed to push all of the memories of the back of my head. i expected to forget about them and move on. kyle was gone, right? i had nothing to worry about while living with rae. she helped me get back on my feet and kyle was no longer a part of my life.

but, i guess i was still a part of his. because when i opened my eyes, there he was. hand on top of mine.

he smiled evilly, but kindly at the same time.

"y/n, i've gotta explain," he blurted out. his thumb gently rubbed against my hand which sent shivers down my spine. the chills hurt because i was so injured. i wanted that to stop, i wanted him to leave. but, he stayed.

"i- i can't... be with you..." i blankly stated. i hope it was enough for him to get up and exit my hospital bed. i wanted to talk to rae. or sukkuno. or leslie or lily or anyone else. anyone other than kyle.

"y/n, please listen to me. i just want you to know that i've changed. i'm better now... i stopped drinking. i'm clean. i still love you," a smug grin formed on his face and he squeezed my hand tighter which caused me to flinch.

"ow," you breathed out your words as it was painful to talk, "let- let g- go of.... me."

"okay... okay," he released your hand from his grip and leaned back in his chair, "you need rest," you turned your head to look him in the eye.

"get out."

~~~~

one cut.

two cuts.

three cuts.

blood everywhere.

that was the day you knew your sister wasn't okay. the day you saw her cutting herself. she used a razor blade. your fathers. his stuff was still here. he hadn't taken it with him yet to his other family.

his new wife was prettier than your mother. she was younger. blonde, skinny. what you wanted to look like.

she drove a range rover, she bought it with your dads money. she carried a louis vuitton matching purse and wallet set, also purchased with your pmfathers money.

when you met her at first, she was nice. but, then you really met her. that gold digging bitch.

you hadn't seen either of your parents in a long time. you were going to visit one day but you had to cancel because bruises decorated your body from kyles harsh not-consensual sex the night prior.

~~~~

"kyle, leave- le- leave pl- please..."

my eyes shuttered open and closed.

entering the memories. leaving the memories, entering the world where kyle was, sitting and watching me suffer in a hospital bed. then reentering my memories.

my sister, allison's, death.

my father leaving you for prissy bitchy clarissa.

my half sister, cleo, being born.

my other half sister, alexandria, being born.

clarissa leaving my father and taking the money, leaving him with cleo and alexandria.

my dad begging for my mother's forgiveness and a place to stay until they could "work things out."

my depression.

my suicide attempt.

my mothers suicide.

my brother, a pothead, moving back in to "take care of me, my father, cleo, and alexandria."

alexandria's boyfriend moving in.

my dads alcohol problem.

kyle.

kyle moving in.

my dad and kyle's first fight.

everything, my whole life. it was back. so was kyle.

was that a good thing? then... no. now...? who knows?

i wanted to push him away and say no but i noticed the care in his voice and the concern he held in his heart. he was genuinely worried about me. was it a hoax? who knows?

i wanted to delete him and move on with rae and sykkuno. but, i needed someone right now. was kyle that person... who knows?

i drifted into a deep contemplation. kyle... no kyle?

~~~~

9:06 PM.

i finally woke up after thinking about kyle, sukkuno, rae, allison, cleo, alexandria, my parents, clarissa, my bother, and everyone else.

i decided to accept kyle back into my life and give him another chance. so stupid, tell me about it.

but, he seemed convincing and i wanted to hear what he had to say.

my eyes opened and i scanned the room for kyle. not to my surprise, he sat in the corner of the room, to your right, rocking in a chair.

"wakey wakey, beautiful. we've gotta talk," he said.

"okay."

889 words :)

well, this chapter is short as hell. anyways, i really enjoyed writing this story and y/n's backstory ;)

i hope you enjoyed and are healthy and happy as always!!

- annah (author)