Not Broken, Just Bruised

[22]

I stare blankly at the neglected pastry that's now upside down on the concrete.

"That poor scone."
His voice sounds from behind me.

Dang it.

I came here as an escape - to get away from life.
But apparently life goes to the same places I use as my emotional release.

I turn around slowly.
"Heyy, Ian."

He's still observing the scone, which is now leisurely blowing away.

"Don't worry about that. I'm tired of them anyway."

Ian's attention falls back on me.

"We just can't seem to catch a break from each other."
I can see a hint of happiness sparkle in his eyes.
Excitement almost.

"It appears so."
I say, with a monotone voice.

Ian's face falls as I instantly realize I've got an unnecessary attitude.
He doesn't know that this is my comfort spot.
Heck, half of me likes that he's here.

"Sorry.. I didn't mean for it to come across so rude."

He chuckles.
"It's all good."

I look up at the shop's sign - which is waving back and forth.
The wind is aggressive today.

"So.."
I hum.
"I didn't know you came here."

He smiles.
"I do. Quite often. I really enjoy their Arabica coffee, 2 creams-"

"-1 sugar?"

"Yeah.."
He says hesitantly.
"How'd you know."

Time stops, right then and there.
I'm being brutally honest when I say that was Matt's exact order. Right down to the creams and sugar.

This is a perfect example of how I can't escape him, and that day, no matter how hard I try.

"I- you-"
I stutter trying to find the right words to say.

I can feel Ian's hands grip my shoulders.
"Ivy?"

"I miss him. God damnnit I miss him!"
I shout, going limp.

I can feel myself slowly fading out of reality, loosing control over all of my emotions.

Ian's got his arm wrapped around my waist - keeping me supported as I continue to babble.

"He ordered that. Exactly that. The coffee, the cream, the sugar - this stupid coffee shop!"
A tear rolls down my cheek - several thoughts running through my mind.

You're crazy.
Get over it.
You're embarrassing yourself.

But it's all washed away as I feel Ian hug me even tighter.
I can feel his hands grip the back of my thighs, indicating that he wants me to jump up.
I comply, my legs wrapped around his waist like a monkey.

I probably look like such an idiot..

"What the hell is going on, Ivy? You need to talk me."
He sighs, his breath against my neck.

"Can we go somewhere else?"
I lift my head up, taking in our surroundings.
"Everyone's looking at us."

Instead of walking away, or letting go of me to spare us the embarrassment - he instead glances at the group of people who have surrounded us.

"Get lost."
He sneers, still entangled with my body.
"We don't need an audience."

Somehow, everyone complies.
Hustling away as if their life depended on it.

I giggle, sniffling away my sorrow.
"Who knew you could be so scary."

"Anything for you darling."

My heart skips a beat.
Within that very moment, a rush of emotion and
desire and complicated grief surges through me.

I can't help but lean in closer to Ian.
I hesitate, overthinking my actions, but he meets me half way - leaving me no time to back out.

Our lips meet, sparks fly.
It isn't aggressive or competitive - it feels comforting. He still has his hands under my thighs, keeping me supported in my position wrapped around his waist.
But before I know it, he pulls away, leaning his forehead against mine.

"Can you tell me what's going on?"
He asks, completely ignoring what just happened.

"It's.. complicated."

He sighs, slowly letting go of me.
My feet safely hit the ground as I stand on my own.
He then grabs my hand, leading me back to his car.

He leans against it, pulling me in between his legs - my back against his chest.

"Talk."