the suffering of harry potter

chapter three.

Trigger warnings!

Be aware, this chapter includes mentions of:

- panic attacks / coping with them

Please read at your own risk!

Stay safe, and look after yourselves. I'm always here if you need anything :)

Anywhos, let's get on with the story. 

chapter three. 

{draco's pov}

"Harry-?" I whispered.

Nothing.

"Harry?" I stated again, a little louder this time, concern lacing my words.

Still nothing. 

"Harry? Can you hear me? Harry?!" I was getting desperate, I didn't know what I was supposed to do. 

Harry groaned. That was answer enough that he could hear me. I let out a breath I didn't realise I was holding in. 

"Hey hey hey hey Harry! Listen to me! You're safe, I promise you. It's just me, Malfoy, Draco." I corrected myself almost desperately. I just wanted to help Harry, I needed to help him. 

I felt the boy slightly stiffen away from my body. It broke my heart a little at the fact that Harry flinched at me, but I guess it was understandable, I wasn't good to him. I quickly masked that emotion, it could wait, and tried to refocus on the task at hand.

"Harry, I am so sorry about everything, but please know I'll never hurt you, not again." And with that, I lightly and cautiously grabbed one of Harry's hands, and placed it on my chest, so that he was able to feel my steady heartbeat.

Harry's breathing seemed to have hitched. His emerald eyes suddenly shot open, and glanced up at me with such a look that broke my heart. He looked so scared, so lost. I wanted nothing more but to cuddle him up and protect him from the unfair world. But for now I would just have to help Harry cope with this panic attack.

Letting in another big gulp of air, I tried to steady my breathing and slow down my heart rate. There was no point getting Harry to focus on my heart beat to calm down if it was going way faster than it should be. 

"Hey Harry? Can you hear that?" I calmly stated, hoping he would still be in the right enough mind to hear me.

The boy who was just about cradled in my lap let out an inaudible noise. It was like he was trying to say something, but was still too panicked to make out coherent words just yet.

"Hey Harry, I'm glad you can hear me, please just keep listening to my voice. You're safe, and you'll be okay. We're currently on our way to Hogwarts. We're going into our Eighth Year now. Everything is okay now. Moldy Voldy (my dark story needed some life okay :') ) is gone, you are safe. I promise you. We're going to try something now okay? You just keep focusing on my voice okay? You're safe here." I know he was truly struggling to focus on my words and fight away whatever dark thoughts that were swirling around his head, but regardless I was so incredibly proud of his efforts.   

"On my count, we're going to do some breathing okay? Just some simple breathing. I promise you that you'll be okay. Keep your hands on my chest okay? We're going to breathe in for 4 seconds together okay. See like this." I demonstrate, sucking in the surrounding air that roamed the compartment, I made sure that my chest and ribs expanded, so Harry would be able to understand.

"And now we're going to hold the air in our lungs for 7 seconds, just like this." And once I could clearly see the emerald eyes looking up at me, I made sure it was obvious I was holding my breath, making little funny faces towards the smaller boy as an attempt to help calm him down. So he knew he was safe here.