Nightlife ✓

15 | theory

The way he waited for me outside of lectures. Our study sessions in the library and the coded flower. That one vulnerable conversation we'd had, strolling through campus, after his symphonic orchestra rehearsal. When he'd grabbed my hand after he'd asked about my relationship with my parents.

When he'd freaking agreed to a lunch date with me in Topaz!

But then again, he also made jokes about using me for my brains. That threw his motivations for spending lectures, tutorial and study time with me into doubt. And, as he said so himself, he did not like influencers. Much less like-like them.

Thus, my brain whirled in a tormenting circle. I was mentally picking petals in a neverending loves-me-loves-me-not game. Added to that were all these conflicting interpretations of my time with him, which incited a tsunami of questions.

Was I naive for letting myself think I was an exception to his dislike of influencers? Was he always just being friendly? Had he been interested until I made a misstep? What was the misstep? Or was this his bizarre way of playing hard-to-get?

Then with one protracted, dying, "Ughhhh," I sat up and adjusted the headband keeping all my baby hairs from my forehead. "Okay. I'm done now. Thoughts?"

Viv rose to her knees and held her index finger out, staring me intently in the eyes. "The thing to remember is that any mature man who likes you will make a move. Those who don't like you, won't. Those who like you but are shy or hesitant, can't. And we all deserve better than that piddly teenage love. We deserve steadfast commitment. Do we all agree on that?"

Riley and I nodded.

She continued matter-of-factly, "If he really liked you, he would have no reason to cancel the lunch date, as opposed to rescheduling. He would want to spend as much one-on-one time with you as possible. Therefore, he doesn't like you."

"Ouch, Viv," Riley winced.

"What?" Viv asked innocently, spreading her palms in the air. "Kris is a big girl. She can take it."

"But why would he spend so much time with her, to begin with, if Quentin didn't like her more than any other friend of his? You've got to admit, what Kris described isn't platonic behaviour," Riley reasoned.

"Hm. Good point," Viv fell back onto her haunches, scratching at her chin just below where the serum mask ended. "Maybe he's keeping you as an option rather than a priority. He's using both friendly and flirty behaviour to keep you in that limbo between platonic friends and actual partners. That way he can take things further when it suits him, or he can still keep getting help for his notes and assignments."

Riley and I gasped. She exclaimed, "That's so vindictive!"

Viv shrugged apologetically, taking a long sip of her hot matcha latte. "He reaches out to you when he's been drinking to get himself and his friends into Topaz. He studies with you to bring up his own grades. If he wanted to date you, he literally would have just rescheduled your date. It's that simple."

"Quen wouldn't use Krista like that. He couldn't!" Riley insisted, shaking her head vehemently. "Not only is he too considerate to lead someone on like that, but he's also incapable of manipulating people like that."

I nodded in agreement, fervently wanting to believe the best of Quen. He made jokes about using me for my brain, sure, but each time we compared work, he'd finished all the questions on his own first. Without help.

Riley rambled on, her eyes glazing over as she said, "Socially, he's a bit of a klutz. Physically, too, now that I recall—"

"—maybe he's changed since high school, Riley. Haven't we all? And what else would explain it?"