Out of the Darkness

Chapter 6

She sat on the edge of Hanna's cot and smiled down at her daughter. The day had been long and her head was buzzing. Hanna looked equally exhausted, her hard day consisting of playing duck duck goose, singing nursery rhymes, and painting countless colorful pictures for her mother. She couldn't help but smile at the beautiful tiny girl. She used her hand to move Hanna's dark curls off of her forehead and leaned down and placed a soft kiss on her smooth young skin.

"G'night mama," she said sleepily finally giving in to the weight of her eyelids and quickly drifted off to sleep.

Hanna's mom quietly moved to the next cot over and laid her weary body down. She pulled the stiff blankets up around her and closed her eyes. She willed sleep to come, but as tired as she was she had too much on her mind. Her head continued to buzz and she was starting to get concerned. It wasn't like a real headache, it didn't actually hurt. But it felt uncomfortably full, that was the only way she could describe it. She squeezed her eyes shut tightly, and shook her head slightly from side to side, as if to shake the sensation away. Suddenly the hair on the back of her neck stood on end and she felt as if her heart might stop.

Sounds popped into her head, inaudible voices. She flung her eyes open to see if she was actually hearing something but was greeted by quiet blackness. She closed her eyes again and waited for the noise to return.

"25 year old female, found down at the park. Status, post trauma. She came in with a GCS of 6. BP is 80 over 60. Exam significant for blunt head trauma. Unequal breath sounds, right pupil is dilated, and she's ready for x-ray."

She laid completely still on her cot, letting the sounds bounce around in her head. She could almost see it happening. The paramedics and doctors whirling around the room, hovering over a woman on a stretcher. She was there. Standing off to the side. She slowly moved closer to the victim. It was as if she was moving in slow motion. Things began to get blurry and just as she was about to loose the vision, she saw the face of the woman everyone was fussing about. It was Allison.

The next morning Hanna's mom was even more tired than usual. She hadn't slept much the night before. She had just tossed and turned trying to wrap her mind around what had happened. She had remembered. She had recalled a memory. It was a small flicker of light, in a vast, endless sea of darkness. But it was something.

She had thought about nothing else all night, the scene replaying over and over in her head. She was still extremely confused as to why she would have been in the trauma room when Allison had been brought in. Her first thought was maybe Allison and she had been friends, but quickly dismissed that idea realizing that Allison would have known her well, not needing to ask Where do I know you from?

Hours later, as the sun began to emerge from the horizon lighting up the darkened basement; she still hadn't come to any conclusions. She wasn't discouraged though. After all, she had remembered. It was a step in the right direction.

After enjoying some warm banana nut muffins, someone had brought in to the shelter, she and Hanna headed off to begin their daily routine once again. She signed her daughter in to the daycare center, and exchanged kisses with her bubbly, excited 4 year old who was anxious to greet her friends and all the toys that were sprawled across the floor.

As she headed back down the long hall towards the elevators, she was practically knocked over by a small, red headed girl with a face full of freckles. The girl didn't even pause to acknowledge the adult she had knocked into and kept on running. Moments later the girl's mother came around the corner hollering ahead to her young daughter,

"Meredith Jane! You stop that right now! What have I told you about running ahead of me?! ... Meredith! ... Meredith!" The woman rushed by not giving a second glance to the stunned stranger in the hall.

Her head was spinning and she suddenly felt nauseous. She quickly searched for a chair and found a small wooden bench outside some offices and sat down. She put her head in her hands and tried to compose herself. She didn't know what was happening. She closed her eyes and heard the young red head's mothers' voice ringing in her ears. "Meredith! Meredith!" The lady's voice soon faded and was replaced by another's

The voice sounded annoyed and she wasn't sure why. "Meredith? Meredith! Let's go right now!" the lady was demanding. A carousel came into focus and she could feel the hard, cold plastic of the painted horse she sat upon. "We need to leave right now!" It was her mother yelling at her. "Mommy, please can I go around just one more time? Mommy? Please!" She was begging. She felt young and scared. She had never seen her mother so upset. Her mother didn't cry, and yet here she was, tears streaming down her face. "Meredith." She said it quieter this time but just as harsh and she knew it was no use. She slid down the horse and followed her mother out the gate and to their parked car. The car ride home had been silent and even as a young child, she was smart, and knew that something had happened and she and her mother would never be the same.

Ten minutes later she still sat on the bench in the quiet hallway. People came and went, but no one gave more than a quick glance to the lady that sat alone.

Meredith. Her name was Meredith. She had remembered her name! She had even remembered her mother! Although that last revelation didn't bring her as much comfort as she would have expected and wasn't sure why. She regained her composure and stood up with a new sense of confidence. She turned and started back down the hall ready to start her day.