A freak accident, a fateful encounter, and now a mission to spy on St. Gloriana?!
In the most absurdly anti-GuP GuP fanfiction (probably) ever conceived, dimension hopper Arthur Bucol agrees to take on a mission from Saunders' commander, Kay, to spy...
Looking up from his plate, it looks as if he got lucky tonight. Assam and Orange Pekoe's plates were filled to the brim with a mountain of chips, tons of battered cod, and a heap of jellied eels.
Immediately, everyone's eyes went blank.
Arthur woke up from this trance seconds later and hoped for the best.
I mean, it can't be that bad...
Right?
Arthur picked up his dinner fork and stabbed the lone jellied eel.
"Pale in colour, a lot of jelly... and there's no discernible scent..."
Bits of jelly peeled off from the plate itself as Arthur lifted the eel. Taking a breath, he sighed and put it in his mouth.
Chewing ever so slowly, Arthur took note of its foreign texture. The jelly covering the eel was absolutely slimy while the eel itself was surprisingly tough to chew. As it turned into mush in his mouth, he gulped it down with a bit of hesitation.
"Seriously? No flavour? I mean, it isn't as bad as I thought but... it's so damn bland!"
Overall, the jellied eel was a bit of an unpleasant sensory experience.
Next up were the chips (or fries, as Arthur is an American.) He picked one up and instantly, a chill went down his spine.
"SOGGY FRIES?! YOU'RE KIDDING ME!"
He hesitantly took a bite into one chip. Like the jellied eel from before, there was no flavour. However, things quickly went downhill.
"At least with the jellied eel, I think it was meant to be cold. But fries are meant to be hot! These are frigid and lack crispiness! Not only that, there isn't any salt on these!"
With the chips down, there was only one item left to try: THE BATTERED COD.
To give credit where credit was due, the battered cod looked very crispy. For once, Arthur perked up at Darjeeling's cooking and he cut through it, hoping for the best.
Bad idea.
Arthur's eyes immediately went blank as he looked at the content. Turns out, there was barely any cod.
"DARJEELING, YOU'RE SCREWING WITH ME, ARE YOU?!"
Struggling with every bite, he managed to down the horrid 110%-batter and 1%-cod monstrosity in a solid 7 minutes.
And with that, he had finished Darjeeling's dinner.
As Arthur looked down at his empty plate, he gave out a sigh of relief and looked up to face Orange Pekoe and Assam-
-Aaaand they're dead.
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Arthur became increasingly worried. "You guys alright?!"
"I really hate her cooking..." Assam groaned heavily.
"Kill me now." Orange Pekoe mumbled with a sickened tone.
"I have to do something about this..." sighed Arthur.
He got up and walked into the kitchen. He turned over to the fridge to see what he can quickly cook up for the two.
However, his eyes were instantly affixed towards a poster sticking on the fridge. It was an advert for an Italian restaurant a couple of blocks away.
Arthur had an idea.
Grabbing the flyer and walking back to the dining table, he simply asked one thing to the two girls,
