ricky and nini's realizations

chapter 69

general pov

the remainder of the weekend is spent very similarly between the two heartbroken teenagers. tears come and go. parents are confused by their kid's behavior. phones blow up with missed texts and phone calls from their friends. falling into the black holes of their minds with endless thoughts and questions making them spiral even more. endless images of the other person flash through their minds. it's as if nothing can fix this and both are left feeling miserable. monday rolls around and neither of them know what to expect walking into school. nini opts for ignoring the world feeling too much pain and embarrassment thinking about seeing ricky's face. she spends her day doing anything and everything she can to avoid him. ricky in the other hand, is trying to do the exact opposite. he wants nothing more than to just hear her voice. that's the least he asking for, but he can't seem to manage accomplishing that. he walks into his government class and finally sees the person he's been looking for. only to find out that she switched seats with greyson. leaving greyson in between the two. he was crushed. he understood that there was no getting through to her right now. she made it very clear that she doesn't want to speak to him or even look at him. sitting through that class was painful to say the least. he couldn't steal glances at her without looking at greyson first. his heart felt shattered as he counted down the minutes in that class so he could escape this tense atmosphere where he felt so unwanted. when before, she made him feel like the most wanted  person ever. the bell rang and ricky was the first one out of the classroom.

nini's pov

i never once looked over in class to see if ricky was there. i'm sure he was, but i didn't want to confirm and find out. it was now lunch time and i didn't bother even going to the cafeteria knowing that i'd have to sit right next to him. i instead go to the theater where i'm sure to be left alone. i eat my lunch in the dimly lit space while listening to gracie abrams in my airpods. i lay on my stomach as i pick a part my sandwich eating bits and pieces of my food. i don't have much of an appetite, but i make sure to eat some food. i finish eating and lay my head down to the floor with my arm laid out resting beneath my head. with only a couple minutes left of lunch, i waste some time scrolling through my phone. at the bell i grab my things and wander to class not in any rush to get there. my day continues on like a blur, but i really didn't care. at one point i got a text from kourtney asking where i've been all day, but i just turned it into a "had lots of studying to do" kind of response. oh well.

ricky's pov

this is torture. she doesn't want to see me, talk to me, or be near me. she can't hardly stand to be in the same room as me. i hate this. i hate everything about this. once it was lunch time, i had high hopes that she would be there. i know she avoided me in government, but our lunch table had all of our friends and she wouldn't avoid them too. after a couple minutes of expecting nini to come sit down at any second, i realized that she wasn't coming. gina has asked where she was and i could only answer with a shoulder shrug. i barely lasted ten minutes in lunch when i felt like i couldn't sit there any longer. i had a pretty good feeling about where she would be and i just had to go see for myself. i dump my untouched food into the trash and return my lunch tray. i go down the hallways with a destination on my mind. i make it to the theater doors opening them slowly and quietly. i respected her to keep my distance, but i couldn't bare to take my eyes off of her. i sat down behind some of the theater props on the stage when i wouldn't be all that noticeable especially if she suspected that she was alone. i just sat there watching her longingly while fiddling with the ring on my finger. after a couple minutes go by, i start contemplating talking to her making my presence known. i obviously didn't do that. i know it wouldn't go well, but that doesn't mean that i don't want to do it. she starts packing up her things meaning that i won't get to look at her anymore. just seeing her is, well it's not enough, but it's enough to settle for right now since it's the best i've got for now. i haven't heard her voice since that night with that same heart wrenching sentence forever stuck in my brain. she stands up unknowingly walking right past me out of the theater's back door into the halls of students. i force myself to head to class as well waiting long enough to ensure that she wouldn't see me walk out of the same door. this routine of keeping my eye on her continued throughout the whole week. i eventually was told that she supposedly had lots of studying to do and she was using lunch as her free period according to our friends. of course i knew that was a lie and that i was the reason for her isolating herself.