Et Nos Cedamus Amori

XVI.

"Hey, you okay?" Jordon asked, tapping his shoulder.

"Yeah, just didn't expect to be rejected like that. It was so gentle and so naive." Brett said, quietly thinking to himself.

"If it means anything to you, I love you... Not in the way Eddy does with you. I really love you but I'm not expecting anything to come out of this, Brett. I just wanted to let you know... I mean, it's pretty obvious that I cannot replace his spot in your life and I'm not asking you to. I just wanted to tell you that, well, I love you." Jordon confessed, everything spilling out now.

"I never knew, Jordon... If I did I would've-"

"It was kinda the point, Brett. For you to not know..."

There was a silence between them. Not awkward nor uncomfortable. Something in between, like how their relationship had always been.

"Aren't you glad that Asian parents decide to go to airports at least three hours earlier?" Brett asked, moving in front of Jordon.

"Why?"

"Because I have time to tell you this. Jordon, I want to give it a chance but not now. Not when I'm utterly in love with my best friend who has a girlfriend of two, almost three years. I want to be fair to you. If I were to love you, I want you to be the only one I love the moment I get in a relationship with you." Brett confessed, holding Jordon's hand.

"You sound exactly like Kotik from my dreams, Brett." Jordon laughed even if he was tearing up a little.

"You know me so well, Ilyich." Brett said without missing a beat.

"Even in this lifetime, it's still him, huh?" Jordon asked, looking at Brett with a smirk.

"I guess so. But I'm being serious, Jordon. I want a relationship where it's Jordon and Brett, not Kotik and Ilyich. I want it to be our present and not a figment of our past. I want you to be with me as Jordon He and not Pyotr Tchaikovsky." Brett said, kissing Jordon's cheek.

"I would love that, Yosef Kotek. But you slick bastard, you had the same name from our past life." Jordon said, looking up at Brett.

"Now, this is not sure, Jordon. I don't want you to wait for me. If there's ever someone who you might just love, you go for it. It's not a sure thing. In case you didn't know, I'm quite a sucker for that boy over there." Brett admitted.

"I know..." Jordon said, laughing a little.

"I'll give it a chance. I just want us to be okay no matter what the outcome is."

"I agree."

Jordon kissed Brett's cheek too and Eddy saw the exchange. Somehow, his heart ached at the sight. He didn't know where it came from but it's there, it's alive and burning. The blood in his veins are boiling and he is seeing red. He never knew why he felt so angry at such a short amount of time.

He should be happy for Brett, he really should. Maybe it was just protective side? Eddy couldn't really think straight after seeing that.

- - - - -

The moment Brett was in his flight to Sydney, flashbacks of his old life come to him. Most specifically, the times with Pyotr. They weren't too romantic but it's when Pyotr confessed his love for Brett.

"Kotik, I have something I have to get off of my chest before I get married to her tomorrow..." Pyotr started, scratching the back of his head.

"Well, Ilyich, you better say it now before you get married tomorrow..." Brett coaxed as he ruffled with Tchaikovsky's hair.

"I am in love with you... Terribly so... I cannot think about anyone but you and I want to constantly follow you until the day that my last breath comes. I want to love you much more than you think you could ever deserve..." Pyotr spilled, each word slipping off his lips, with love and truth.

Brett stated at him with awe and decided to chose his words.

"Ilyich... We cannot. You already know that. I still have a love living in my heart and I do not want you to carry the burden of that. He is still living within me and my every move... Pyotr, you are a great man. You know that you are..." Brett said as he breathed deeply. "You deserve the greatness of love that you shall not compete with. You deserve love that is only dedicated for you. I cannot give that..." Brett added as he held Pyotr close to him.

"Kotik, he does not deserve you. Not in any shape or form... I still cannot believe you love him all these years. I want to be this man, you know." Pyotr said as he cried on Brett's shoulder.

"The amount of times I had heard that..." Brett chuckled through his tears. "Believe me, Ilyich... I would love you if I do not have this figure of a man in my head... Now, do not cry. A beautiful man like you should not have tears streaming down your face." Brett added as he pulled away from the hug and wiped Pyotr's tears.

"If I did not love you, I would have thrown you out this window because of your stupidity!" Pyotr said as he laughed, but tears were still streaming down his cheeks

"What can I say, Pyotr? Love has always been the enemy and the ally..." Brett said, wiping his tears away.