Royal Obligations

Chapter 14: Jealousy

Dinner was filled with awkward silence. Neither prince would look at me, and the king and queen had other matters to take care of.

Taylor tried to make conversation with Forrest, and it sounded so desperate it was almost pathetic.

"Prince Forrest," she says, loud enough for me to hear.

I find it intriguing how this girl thinks she can hurt me. Felicity is no longer her target.

I am. Thanks Forrest.

And I had absolutely no problem with that, because she didn't scare me. Unless she had a gun pointed to my head, I had nothing to be afraid of.

"Yes?" He leans over toward her, his eyes flickering up toward me.

"Let's get out of here. This dinner is depressing."

His smirk was directed at me.

I wasn't sure what he was trying to do here. I was never sure what he was trying to accomplish.

"Have fun," I mouth with a sincere expression on my face.

This seems to get on his nerves as he stands up, pulling Taylor with him. He places a hand on her lower back and guides her out of the dining room.

I couldn't laugh. If I did I'm pretty sure it would ruin everything. I made the mistake of glancing up and having my eyes lock with Harlan's.

It was a mistake because he looked angry... I'm pretty sure it was anger.

I start to panic as I realize I'm not exactly sure what that look was. I need to get a grip. My knowledge involving people and their actions is falling short, and I needed to talk to the person who is on top of all of this.

"If I may be excused." I say, breaking eye contact with Harlan and standing up.

I didn't wait for an answer as I hurried out of the dining room.

Once I got to my room, Elise was already there waiting for me.

"Cordelia, I saw the report..." She trails off and I finally break down and scream bloody murder.

It was strange how I grew to trust Elise so easily. It was strange how I seemed to trust the most unusual people.

"Cordelia!" Elise shouts and I stop my screaming immediately.

"What the hell was that?" Elise asks in horror as I stalk toward my closet. "Frustration." I answer. "A lot of it."

"Oh Cordelia, what happened with you and Harlan-"

Like he was summoned, there was a knock on the door.

I rub my temples, suddenly developing a headache.

Elise answers the door with a frown, but curtsies anyway. "Your majesty."

"Is Cordelia in here?" he asks.

I didn't want Elise to be torn between duty and friendship, so I come out of the closet and look at Harlan. "Right here."

Harlan doesn't really know what to do, because he scratches the back of his neck then looks over at Elise.

"I'll uh, give you two some privacy." she says and closes the door behind her.

"Harlan-" I start, because I already see the same look he gave me at the dinner table return.

Dammit. I didn't even get to ask Elise what this could possibly mean.

"Cordelia, seriously?" Harlan asks frustrated, running a hand through his hair. "All this time I thought you were here for me, and you've been running around with my brother?"

"Please," I give him an annoyed look, one that is very much real. "I'm here to fight for both of you. It's not any different than what you are doing. You go on dates with these girls all the time, so what does it matter if I went on a date with your brother once? And honestly, it wasn't even a date!"

"Then why are you so special to him?" Harlan asks, his expression dark.

It dawns on me that Harlan probably knew. No, not probably. He did know his brother's actions, and how his brother played with all these girls. And he didn't even think to stop him? And he had the temerity to accuse me of being one of those girls?

"You are not serious." I say firmly, looking him straight in the eye.

Harlan doesn't back down, and I find myself admiring him for it. But that admiration doesn't last long. "If you didn't go on a real date with him, that can only mean-"

"I think you need to leave." I say in a shaky voice, emphasizing my 'hurt'.

I wasn't actually hurt here, I could see where he was coming from. If I'm being honest, I probably would have thought the same thing too. He hardly knew me, and being the lowly technical eight that I am, I guess he would expect nothing less.

Harlan opens his mouth to say something else, but I guess the look on my face halted his actions. I saw the look of regret wash over his features as he realized what he just said. That look I wasn't positive about...

I'm pretty sure it was jealousy. It was the same look I caught Taylor giving me earlier tonight.

"Cordelia..." He trails off, trying to find the right words to say.

If I forgave him so easily, I wouldn't be the girl he thought he was falling for.

Jealousy is a bitch, Harlan.

***

Dear Collective Mind,

After looking over my last letter, I realized how pathetic I sounded. I must have reached a low, because I never babbled like that in a long time.

Needless to say, everything is back on track. After Harlan left my room, I knew for a fact he was going to try and make this right. Of course I would tease him a little, but I would eventually forgive him. I needed to in order to stay in this competition, because I sure wasn't staying in this competition for Forrest. But a life with Forrest Schreave is better than a life back at the foster home, then sent out onto the streets with no money because once I turn eighteen they have to kick me out. No one wanted to adopt an eighteen year old bi-polar teenage girl.

At least that's what I saw myself as.

I wonder sometimes how Allison is doing. If Clarissa takes care of her, if Valerie does her hair, if Samantha watches me on the report. They were my family for a while, but not a real family. I don't mean they weren't real because they aren't blood or they weren't parents. I mean it in the sense to truly be a part of a family, there had to be love involved. And you know my thoughts about love.

In other news, I fully plan on visiting with Gloria Renaldo tomorrow after breakfast. I asked Elise about her whereabouts, and it turned out Gloria grew up with King Clarkson.

Just the truthful opinion I needed. That is, if she would even tell me anything. I doubt she will tell me deep and dark secrets of the past during our first meetings, but I know how to get people to trust me. No matter how old or how wise or how stubborn they are.

I question myself sometimes, on why I am still trying to find out more about Clarkson. I wanted to say it was because I still needed to keep Forrest in mind, but the cold hard truth was that I was unhappy. I usually didn't let myself become unhappy, because I locked out all those sorts of feelings for a long time. Research, writing, reading was all I had as a child. All I had to keep me busy. Keep my mind busy. Keep it off my parents and how I probably would be stuck in a foster home all my life. Well, you know what they say.

Old habits die hard.

Sincerely, Cordelia.