shrek x duolingo; bon appetite

where it all started

As he landed in Paris, all he could think about was Fiona. The sweet air whistling across his face made some of the girls 'oooooh'and fan themselves. He was indeed hot and there was no way Fiona could say no to this baby. But Shrek wanted to do something more for Fiona. He forgot to bring her a necklace from home and he didn't have any money in his pockets. He then thought learning French would be very romantic. So he opened the Duolingo app and learned the important words.

Bonjour je suis Shrek (hi I am shrek)

Je t'aime tellement (ilysm)

Je suis tellement sexy (I'm so secc)

Baise moi (fuck me)

(btw if these sentences don't make sense, this ain't on me. Blame google translate)

As Shrek was mugging up these sentences, he felt his phone vibrate vigorously, as if something wanted to come out of it. And there came out Duolingo from his phone, which left his jaw wide open. Shrek had never seen such a hot guy. Ooh lala his abs tho. Shrek began to question his sexuality.

"And you must be Shrek? Hi, I'm Duolingo and I will be your personal assistant. I shall be helping you with French today. Now shall we?"

These words made Shrek's heart flutter. And that's where it all started.