CHAPTER 9

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~Playground~


Hindi ko alam bakit dito ako dinala ng mga paa ko.

At dito ko na din sinimulang basahin ang letter na bigay daw ni Topher.



Dear Stupid / Charmaine,

I already know you have amnesia..pero alam kong pag binasa mo na to. You remembered everything do you? Tss.. hindi ko alam kung paano ko to sisimulan and hindi ko alam kung anong mangyayri pagkatapos nito. But promise me, after you read this, just don't cry again, please.

Dati pa kita gusto. I'm only 7 when I met you. Lagi kitang tinitignan. I can't talk to you or come near to you because I'm too shy that day. My mom said, torpe daw ako! But i'm not!

I asked some people that know your name and where do you live, finally I found it.

You're Charmaine Garcia. Nang malaman ko na kung saan ka nakatira doon na kita laging sinusundan. I'm already 18 years old but still hindi pa din kita nilalapitan or even saying hi to you. But one day, when someone's calling, I thought, that was just an unknown number.

Alam ko naman na niloloko mo lang ako at hindi ko talaga alam na ikaw na yung kinakausap ko. But when you called me again and told me about your dad, promise, I don't really know anything about that. My parents never talk about their business to me.

At habang tumatagal ang usapan natin. Alam kong darating ang araw na makikilala kita, and when that day came saying my name to you, I was expecting you'll get surprise because I have a well-known family name, but you didn't.

Then it's your turn to say your name, damn. I couldn't open my mouth and my tongue was stocked. My ultimate crush is absolutely talking to me.

Nang lumipas ang panahon, everything changed when I accidently saw you in the playground, looking at you makes me feel like the luckiest man living in this world. And I realized that you were really looking at me so I drove fast enough in order to get out of there.

Then one day, naubusan ng gasolina yung kotse ko. I saw you again in that playground, sitting on the swing, tumitingin ka din sa mga batang naglalaro. I called my driver and calmed myself first while sitting because you were there.

Dahil mapaglaro ang tadhana at dahil napaka uto uto mo, nagpapauto ka sa mga bata. Umupo ka na lang bigla sa tabi ko.

That was unexpected dahil na sa tabi na kita. But you suddenly said that you'll go, so the girl urged you to say hi to me first, it was the time that my heart kept beating so fast and loud, akala ko nga naririnig mo.

And when you actually said it, I thought that was my chance to look into your eyes. It's awkward to say but you're so damn beautiful, I know it sounds crazy but those eyes tell me not to get out of it.

Pero inalis ko pa din, tss.

Nung kinausap ako ng dalawang bata ay hindi ko sila pinansin, and the only word that came to my mouth was 'TSS'

The boy said that you looked pale. Sobrang nag alala ako sayo. But you just walked away then you fell on the grass. I ran towards from you, and told you na pumunta tayong ospital.

And that was the day na nalaman ko na anemic ka.

I knew you didn't recognize me while the nurses and doctors were saying my last name.

So I texted you after you left the hospital.

Tss.

When you really knew me. I always went to the playground just to see you. It was not really an accident na minsan nagkikita tayo doon. I'm making a difficult decision to say how I feel for you, but I can't.

Pinakilala na kita sa parents ko pero they were worried about something else, I'm expecting na aasarin nila ako, hindi ko na lang talaga pinansin yun.

Nang makarating tayo sa EK... pinagpaalam pa nga kita sa mom mo hanggang mapayag natin siya? As a matter of fact, that was the happiest day i've ever had, I like how you look so stupid that makes me laugh. I knew that you were mad at that time because there were some other girls looking at me and some of them flirting with me, but don't worry, sayo lang talaga ako. Tss.

But there's someone who wants to touch you? I'll never forget that guy. Pag nakita ko ulit sya, I will surely kill him!

By the way, do you remember that we hid? The truth is, we're hiding because my friends were there too and they knew you and that I like you, I'm not ready na malaman mo na gusto kita and at some point they will just flirt with you, that jerks! You're only mine.

At eto na nga, nung malaman ko ang sikreto ng parents ko. Nalaman mo na din ito at the same time. You were there standing and heard everything about our secrets and your father. I'm really asking for forgiveness. Please forgive my family and also... me.

Naaksidente ka pa tuloy dahil samin. Ipinunta kita sa ospital. My world suddenly collapsed knowing that you cannot live any longer as you wanted, kasi may sakit ka sa puso and malala na yon. But there's a possibility na magkaka amnesia based sa sabi ng doctor dahil sa damage nangayri sa ulo mo. So I decided to donate my heart not informing you.

Hindi mo rin naman agad ako ma aalala at I'm hoping na pag bumalik na ang ala-ala mo, mabasa mo ito. I suggest to your mom for not letting you use your phone and not mentioning anything about me. My parents paid the bill kapalit na din ng pagkamatay ng father mo, and they already admitted to your mom na pinatay nga nila ang father mo. Pinatawad pa rin ng nanay mo ang parents ko dahil nalaman nyang bubuhayin ka namin kahit papaano, pero alam ko talagang she will never forgive us because of what we did to your family.

I told my mom that I'm happy seeing you alive and doing great things in your life. But she only cried. I want you to live longer and get unforgettable memories. Don't worry, hindi ko na naman gustong mabuhay, because I can't manage my parents' business because of what they had done to your father. I know that you only see me as your friend. But I see you as my special someone.

Take care and always keep my heart. Sorry because wala ka nang kaibigan na makakapitan, wala na ako dyan. And, pag magmamahal ka ng iba, make sure that guy will never hurt you like I've done, at magmamahal naman sayo katulad ko. I will kill whoever breaks your heart. Always remember that I'm here for you even though I'm no longer in your world. Be brave and strong whatever happen.

P.S. I love you and I will always love you. Goodbye.

Your loving friend,

TSS

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