"If I say yes, what will you do?"
Off stared at Gun's back hoping he'd turn around so he could see his eyes, and he'd know if he really meant what he said. But Gun's eyes remained on the TV.
"How can I not get over you when you made me feel like I was just a short chapter in your life. I feel like I was just in your drafts waiting to be published and be seen by others. We may have spent years together but we spent all of those years in hiding with me holding on to uncertainties the future may bring. I got tired Off. I just got tired. And I know you got tired, too."
"Gun, I know I may have hurt you in the past but always know that my feelings were sincere. I know it was my mistake but I wasn't ready to let the world know yet. I got afraid, afraid to be judged, to be seen as different. You know how society works. I just didn't wanna get hurt back then."
"So, you settled with hurting me instead?"
A long stretch of awkward silence hovered across the room. Only the muffled voices of the characters of the show playing on the TV could be heard. Words got stuck in Off's mouth. He couldn't utter a single word and it seemed like the air inside the room was suffocating him, slowly strangling him as he watched Gun stood up, switched off the TV and turned to look at him.
"It's all in the past now. Let us not bother looking back at things that no longer matter. Don't worry. I'm just staying for a short time while I fix some things. Had it not been due to your mother and my mothers' request, I wouldn't live here with you. Good night, Off."
Off was left in the living room still trying to process everything. But what bothered him the most was the drop of tear that fell off Gun's face as he went to his bedroom, or was he imagining things.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
9 years ago. 4 months into Freshman year.
Since their encounter at Off's condo, Off and Gun's relationship seemed to get better than the first time they met. Off also occasionally ordered from the store where Gun worked, and they sometimes watched movies at Off's condo when Gun no longer had deliveries that night. He discovered that Gun came from a broken family. His mother was the only one raising him and his younger sister, so he wanted to help his mother by doing food deliveries at night.
His friends Tay and Arm got suspicious as to why Off no longer bothered Gun, but he kept his mouth shut about it.
It was one of those nights when Off ordered for late dinner. Gun was sitting on the floor munching on the bucket of chicken Off bought for the both of them. Instead of a movie, they decided to just play some music on Off's speakers while talking about some random stuff.
Off was on the sofa looking at Gun amusingly. During the time they had spent together, Off had found a soft spot for Gun, and since he was an only child, it kinda made him happy to somewhat treat Gun like a sibling.
"Why aren't you eating Off?" Gun looked up at Off, still munching on a chicken thigh.
"I am not that hungry yet. Go on, continue eating. I'll eat later."
♬ There's traffic on the bridge
But the skyline shines with a certain light
And I know you're sick of it
But I know a happy hour nearby
And there's a possibility
That one day, things will get better
For the huddled masses in between
The shadows and the stars ♬
"Oh! So you also listen to this song?" Gun asked with a smile on his face.
"Yeah. This band's songs are good, and I feel like they're underrated."
♬ Floating empire
Held up by fraying wire
I'll cover you in winter
Like a blanket by the fire
And when the rent's too high
We'll just buy cheaper wine
And hang on to see if whether
Constellations hold together or not ♬
"You know what I love about the stars? They give me a sense of hope with the way they shine even in the darkest of nights. I'd like to think that I am one of them. That even though in the darkest phase of my life, I'm still as beautiful as them, that I have my own glow, and that I could be a reason someone looks up to the sky even in the darkest night."
Off just stared at the young man who was now looking outside his condo's window, staring at the starless sky for the stars were drowned by the city lights.
♬ I never placed too much faith in the stars
I never placed too much faith in my heart
But the siren call of the chandelier city
And inch-by-inch, we're breaking apart
As we're rising through the dark
From the sky, I bet the lights look pretty ♬
"Come on. Let me take you somewhere." Off held out his hand to help Gun stand.
"Where are we going?"
"Just trust me."
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Off stared at the picture frame on his bedside table. It was a picture of him and Gun on their graduation day which also happened to be a day before their second anniversary. He had his arm around Gun's shoulder. Only their close friends knew about their relationship at that time and Off deeply regretted that.
♬ Floating empire
Held up by fraying wire
And I will cover you in winter
Like a blanket by the fire
When the rent's too high
We'll just buy cheaper wine
Hang on to see if whether
Constellations hold together or not
Or not ♬
Song Used:
▷The Midnight - Brooklyn
YOU ARE READING
Under a Million Stars
Romance[COMPLETED] BoyxBoy Off didn't expect that the roommate his mother was referring to would be his first love, Gun Atthaphan who also turned out to be his ex-boyfriend. _________ Off has always been in love with Gun, but time was not on their side as...
