AFTER THERE'S YOU // ZESSA

Chapter 4: Moving Back

Suddenly, a man walks out of the bathroom. Jumping back into the door frame, I gasp and smack my head on the wood. Ouch.

But it isn't Hardin I see staring back at me. It's an older man with a clip board. I panic for a split second until it dawns on me that I know him.

"Sorry to startle you Miss Young. I'm your - "

"Landlord," I reply, rubbing the back of my head to sooth it's dull ache.

"Yes. I got a call from Mr. Scott's father today about possibly breaking the lease. I tried to call you but didn't get a call back, so I came here to assess any work that needs to be done in the meantime."

"Oh...okay," I say back. "Don't you need my permission to break our lease?" Why is it always seen as Hardin's place and not both of ours?

"That's exactly right Miss Young. Are you wanting to back out too? I can take Mr. Scott off the lease and put it completely in your name if you prefer," he says.

I look down at the carpeted floor, contemplating what to do. I can't afford this place on my own. Actually, I can't afford anything now that my internship is over.

"I'm sorry but I need to break the lease as well. How much will the fines be to back out?" I hope it isn't too much. I really need every dollar I have now.

"Oh, no need to worry about that Miss Young. Mr. Scott has offered to pay any fees for this. You'll just need to sign here that you'll no longer be a tenant and hand in the key before Friday."

Friday is three days from now...not much time to find a new place. But honestly, I don't think I could spend another night here anyway.

I look around the apartment and all I see is us - what we were. The lamp I bought that Hardin replaced after breaking the original one in a fight. The oak table we'd have dinner at every night. The stain on the carpet from when he broke a bottle of whiskey into a million pieces. I shiver, feeling almost haunted by the memories.

"I'll sign. And if you can wait maybe 30 minutes, I can pack up my things and give you my key now," I say.

I quickly rush around the apartment, gathering my personal items and leaving the ones we bought together. After lugging out a hamper full of clothes, my toothbrush, and my backpack, I hand over the key.

"Just sign here Miss Young and you'll be free to go," the landlord says.

I take a deep breath and try to stop the stream of memories flooding my mind. Flashes of Hardin's face nearly consume me before I'm able to shake them from my head.

I let go of the breath I'd been holding in, shake my hair out of my face, and sign the document.
This is really it.

"Thanks," I say quickly. I turn and rush out the door before I can let the weight of what I've done hit me.

I get into my car, turn the ignition, and stop. Where exactly am I going? It just dawned on me I have no place to go. I signed away my apartment, gave up my old dorm, and can't go back to Landon's anymore.

I put my face in my hands and sob. I can't believe this is my situation. I never should have given Hardin the time of day. I never should have cheated on Noah. Sweet Noah who was nothing but kind and loving towards me. Why am I so horrible? I was never this horrible until I met...him. I don't want to be this terrible person who always takes back her shitty boyfriend while not caring who it tears apart in the process.

I beat the steering wheel with my fists, my hair now stuck to the tears on my cheeks. I must look insane.

OK. I take a deep breath in, count to 10, and release. I do this for what seems like an eternity until I'm calm. You will be okay Tessa! You are stronger and better than this! Get your shit together girl!

My internal pep talk seems to work, and I decide to call the only friend I have left. Steph. I could call my mom but after being slapped and left to fend for myself, she isn't my first choice.

Steph picks up on the third ring.

"Hey, Tessa what's up? I heard about Hardin..." she says. I can't tell if she sounds empathetic or annoyed.

"Uh yeah, um... Listen, I need to ask you for a huge favor," I say.

"Okay," she replies.

"Can I please stay in your dorm for the night? I would stay at a hotel but I don't have much money right now. I lost my internship..." I'm embarrassed all over again as I admit that fact out loud.

"Oh shit. That sucks Tessa. Umm... hold on," she says into the phone. I can tell she's put me on mute. With each second that passes I feel more and more dumb for asking.

Finally, she says, "Yeah that's fine, I can meet you over there in 20 minutes. Does that work?"

"Oh my gosh thank you so much Steph. You have no idea how grateful I am." Some good news for once.

"Okay, see you soon. Bye."

20 minutes later, I'm outside of my old dorm building. I sit on the bench outside of the main entrance, watching students go in and out of the building. They seem so normal and at ease. Just getting through another day, carrying books or laundry wherever they're going, maybe even going to meet friends at a library. That should have been me. But instead, I'm outside like some homeless person waiting for some good luck to come my way. Wait, who am I kidding, I am a homeless person. I even have the bloodshot eyes and crazy hair to match.

I start laughing, loudly, at the thought of how insane I must look, when I catch a girl about my age staring at me. She gives me a weird look and swipes her card to get into the building, quickening her pace to get away from me. Yep, I'm losing it.

Just then, I see Steph's flaming hair walk around the corner. She spots me and quickly runs over.

"Hey, so, what's going on?" she says. She raises her arms in an annoyed manner and taps her foot, her face contorting into a frown. Just what I need, another person mad at me.