LightWeight

Step Thirty-Six

The stage light blinded me, and the leather chair itched my bare shoulders. My black skinny jeans seemed too tight even though I had bought them a few weeks ago, and I felt like love handles were spilling form the side of my fitted V-Neck. The only think I was okay with were my orange wedges, and even those seemed too bright for my liking.

"So, Lyric, how have you been lately?" Kathy asked. I observed her orange pencil skirt and purple peplum top wondering if I'd ever be brave enough to wear a color combination like that.

"I've been...okay. Days have been greater but," I shrugged. "It's like." Because heartbreak is a part of life, right?

"Why do you say that?" She appeared to lean forward, as if being too far out of my personal square would mean not hearing my reply.

"Well, as you know I quit the Up All Night tour for personal reasons, and as of lately...I've decided to terminate my contract with me recording label."

The crowd I forgot was even there gasped in shock. Being live, I remembered to leave my phone backstage so the vibration notifications wouldn't describe me. The thought of leaving something that has been a part of my life for so long, and helped me get through so much, hurts me enough for all of us. I don't want to see what other people have to say about it, because that'll only make me feel guilty, and I know I need to do this for myself.

"But...why?"

"Well," I swooped my bang back since it moved in front of my eyes. "I could say because I want to focus on my education, which is true because I've been enrolled in College this past year, but that's not the entire reason. The place I was at almost three months ago...wasn't a good place. I remember music being my escape. I wrote my lyrics for me and my eyes only, you know? And while sharing that with others who could relate was something very enjoyable...it wasn't something I loved, or at least I don't think it was. It became a chore, and I hate chores. I don't want my lack of interest to affect what I give

the fans because they deserve the absolute best and I'm not at my best right now."

"Okay, would any of that have to do with your recent relationship with CJ from Backstreet?"

The audience whooped as if the same question was on their mind and I hoped my cringe wasn't too noticeable. Two weeks and hearing his name still heart just as much as it did previously.

"We don't have a relationship." I said simply, ignoring the hurt form how true the words were.

"But it has, or at least was, reported that you two had been spotted together several times."

"Friends. I left the tour kind of abruptly, and since the last show was in such close proximity to my house, and it was my birthday, he decided to stop by."

"That's not what this picture shows."

On the monitor a picture of our slightly teary departure as he left to Atlanta was displayed.

"Like I said, friends. He was a nice guy, but we were never anything more than tour mates..." I made sure to imply that that was the last of this question. Of course I expected for it to come up numerous times, not knowing how obvious we were about whatever we had, not that I really tried to hide it, but I didn't know it would hurt this much.

"Well, there we have it. Stay tuned for a performance from Lyric as well as an exclusive." I heard the entire crowd Oooh with her as the set beeped, letting me know it was on commercial.

We had a ten minute break, and instead of sitting there to wait I decided to rampage the snack table. I could swear I ate breakfast, but my days seemed to run together so much that could have been yesterday. What I do know is those little Sub sandwiches looked way better than they normally did. I made sure to grab a Chicken one, or Turkey, just not Pork. I haven't ate it in years, so I was afraid of what it would do to my stomach if I did indulge in it right now.