Lessons On Kissing Guys (BoyxBoy)

Chapter 6

My forehead rests against his as we lean back from the kiss, and suddenly one thought enters my mind and one thought only; this is so fucking wrong. The simple thought is effective in making me jump back and start running away.

I don't have a clue where I'm going, but I know I'm running to get away, and I'm glad that I have always been so good at athletics, as otherwise I have no doubts I'd have tripped over now or maybe even been caught by what's-his-name. Maybe Dad's pressure to be the star sportsman of the house paid off. Ha. I bet my so-called brother has taken over the spotlight by now. Hell, he probably had as soon as I closed the door behind me.

Shaking the thought from my head, I continue running, not caring that I am so fucking drenched it's like someone's thrown twenty buckets of water of me. Hell, I think I am water by now. Yet, I still keep running through it, not bothering to find shelter. Because right now, I want to be anywhere, anywhere other than near that faggot.

I don't know what comes over me, but after another few minutes, I stop. Just stop. There's no reason behind it, I just stop running, dead-still, and stand there for a minute. And there's no fucking way I'm going to let my mind take me on some crazy ass spiritual journey, I'm not that type of guy. So instead, I just clear my mind and do nothing other than stand there, taking in deep breaths.

Running my hands over my face in distress, I start walking, knowing that if Blair had wanted to, he would've found me by now. If he really cares. Not that I care that he doesn't care. That's fine by me. Because I don't care about him either. So it's fine.

I look up at the sky as I walk, taking in the darkness. It's way past midnight.

And typically, I have no where to go. I don't have a house, or a flat, or anywhere. The 'rents have chucked me out, my brother hates me, so if he even had his own place, it would be off limits, but of course, our dearest parents love him so much that he's actually allowed to stay home. And I'm definitely not going back to that Blair guy's place. Never in a million years.

I continue walking, passing by so many people that I never want to become. I pass by all these people who look as if all they do is walk the streets, no doubt selling drugs, or... other stuff, and I realise that I desperately need a place, and a job, because this will never be me. But for now, it looks like the only place I can really stay is the park bench.

I veer to the left, ready to walk in the park, when I hear a car pulling up and someone honking the horn. I'm expecting it to be Blair. Fuck, I don't know why, but I'm hoping it's Blair. Which makes no fucking sense, so I ignore my hopes. But as I continue ignoring the repetitive honks, I hear a voice finally shout out; "Oi! Want a ride?"

It's a feminine voice. Definitely not Blair. I sigh, in what seems to be... disappointment? Ha, no way. I shake off the thought.

Turning around, I see a blonde girl sticking her head out the window. And - no offense to her, okay, maybe some offense - she looks like a complete barbie doll who's wanting to manipulate some hot guy she saw on the street into a night full of sex. I almost take up her unspoken offer, I even start walking towards the car. My lips form a seductive smile, I'm letting her know I want her too. But just as my hand reaches out for the handle of the passenger door, I stop. Dead still, can't help it. I stop.

"Fuck off." I say to the girl, annoyed with myself and taking it out on her. Annoyed with myself because for some reason, I can't seem to get in the car with her and let her take me to her place, where she'd no doubt have some lighted candles at the ready, and we'd do our thing. I can't fucking do that, and I don't know why. Or maybe I do know, but I don't want to admit the reason. Especially not to myself.

Turning on my heel, I walk away. Suddenly I feel a hand on my arm, I know it's her. She trails her fake nail down my bicep, and I can feel the slight tickle of it through my leather jacket. Her breath fans across the back of my ear, as she attempts a charming whisper; "I can make you feel so much better." But I don't let myself fall for it.