Just By Chance

23. Questions

The room was quiet as Beam and Kit tried to come up with ways to get their friend to feel better but they were failing. There was nothing they could do to make the big guy feel better this time. Phana sat in the windowsill of his room, staring out the window at the drizzle that was starting to come down, running his finger absentmindedly over the glass. Tonight had been the night he confessed his feelings to Wayo and apologized for all the hard times he had given him. But instead of accepting him, Wayo ran away and told Phana to stay away from him. 

Phana let his tears fall slowly down his face as if he couldn't even feel them. 

"Phana." Kit called him softly. He didn't want to baby him but he also didn't know how to speak to him when he was hurting so badly. "Phana, you have to eat something. You haven't had anything all day long."

Beam and Kit knew something was up when Phana never showed up for class and didn't respond in the group chat. When they got to his room so see what was going on, they found his door slightly ajar and a very sad Phana sprawled across his bed still in his uniform. Only his shirt was untucked and his tie was hanging loosely around his neck. This was not their normally neat and punctual group leader.

"Yea, come on Boss. At least drink something. You've been crying all day, you might be dehydrated already."

Kit nudged Beam and gave him an annoyed look.

"What?" Beam whispered. "It could be true."

Kit got up and placed a small styrofoam container in Phana's hands. "It's just something light. You should eat it, big guy." 

Phana looked at Kit and Kit could see all the tears sitting in the rim of his eyes. His nose was pink and so was the surrounding area of his eyes. Phana then looked down and opened the container. Inside there were four large fried rice paper rolls in a neat line.

"It's your favorite!" Beam said happily from across the room. Kit watched Phana, thinking this would make him happy but he became very startled when he realized that it was not a smile forming on Phana's face, but his face was contorting into more sadness until finally he began to fully cry.

"Wait, what's wrong? Pha, you love these!" Kit began to panic. Even Beam stood to his feet in shock at this unexpected reaction.

"Yo loves these too." He sobbed. What Beam and Kit didn't know was that Phana had taken Yo out on two dates, one at a restaurant and one at a local fair, and he and Yo had eaten fried rice paper rolls twice and Yo absolutely loved them. This snack that was supposed to make him happy, only made him think about Wayo even more.

"Oiii, thanks a lot Ai'Beam! I told you to just get him the damn omelette."

"Well, how would I know that he and Nong Yo have the same favorite food??"

Phana let out a wail and both Kit and Beam jumped.

"Don't say his name!" Kit scolded Beam.

"I'M SORRYYY."

Beam ran to Phana's refrigerator and pulled out the popular grape Oishi drink. Phana's fridge was always stocked with many different flavors but grape was his favorite.

"Here, Boss. Drink this and calm down a little." Beam handed the drink to him as Kit removed the rolls from his hands and set them to the side.

Phana took the drink but didn't open it.

"Drink, Pha." Kit urged him. So Phana took a deep breath so he could breathe properly, opened the drink and took a long swig.

"Theeerrree we go." Beam said in a sing-songy voice. He turned to Kit and threw his hands up and gave a look as if to ask 'what now??' It was very rare for them to have to take care of Phana like this. Phana had always been the more fatherly one of the trio when he wasn't hung up over and chasing Yo. And he was always very good at controlling his emotions. It was why they called him The Boss. So moments like this were hard for them to handle.

Kit started gently. "Phana...we all knew that there was a chance this wouldn't go well. You and Yo haven't been on good terms for many years. He's probably just confused."

"Yea. I would be confused too if the love of my life bullied me, never showed any interest, got me wrapped up in a bet, then confessed to me after all this time."

"Not. Helping. Beam." Kit frowned at him.

"Sorry."

"I'm so stupid." Phana clenched the bottle as he turned to face the window and began to cry again.

"No, no, no, no. You're not stupid. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that." Beam said hurriedly.

"Yea, Pha. After all, you realized your mistake and you tried to make it right. Who knows, Yo might change his mind. Maybe he just needs some time." Kit added.

"No. Beam is right. It's been so long and I have never showed any interest in him before. Why should he believe me? Even Forth showed Beam more attention than I showed Yo." Phana said, shaking his head sadly.

But those words caught Beam off guard. What did he mean by that? He blinked a couple times and looked at Phana speechless. Kit saw this and tried to get the focus off Beam and back on Phana and Yo.

"Don't give up yet. Just give him some time. Only time will tell, right?" Kit gave Phana a nudge.

"I guess so."

"Right, Beam?" Kit asked but Beam was still thinking about what Phana had just said.

"Only time will tell, right?" He repeated with a slight tone change. 'Pay attention' is what he was saying with his expression.

"Oh, yea, yea. Give it some time..." Beam trailed off.

Even Forth showed Beam more attention than I showed Yo.

Beam had to admit that Phana was right. Beam had a crush on Forth from the moment he first met him their freshman year but Forth had never shown him much attention unless they were in situations where they absolutely had to speak. He treated him like a normal person if he ever even noticed him at all. And this year, their sophomore year, hadn't proved to be any different at first...until the day Forth darn near broke his nose, and then again on that random day at the canteen when Forth suddenly asked him out. Why had he done that? Did he have hidden feelings for him all this time? Did his feelings for Beam develop over time or suddenly? What had caused the change?

"It's not over yet." Kit was saying to Phana whose tears were still streaming down his face. "Don't give up. Wait until your sadness passes and Yo's anger dissipates a little bit. Then try again. If Yo has had feelings for you even through all of this, then they don't go away so suddenly just because he's mad."

"Yea, Boss. I think you still have a chance." Beam chimed in.

Phana looked at his friends then back down at his hands that were still wrapped around the grape drink. "Thanks guys."

Beam was glad they could make their friend feel better but as soon as they stopped talking, his brain immediately went back to that statement.

Even Forth showed Beam more attention than I showed Yo.

He knew that Phana hadn't meant anything by it but the words were still making him think. What had changed Forth's mind? Why now?