Breathe

ten

I was struggling to get through the crowd later on that night, with drinks in both my hands. The whole house was filled with dancing teenagers, leaving me to wonder if people from other towns had come here as well. There was no way all of them could be from around here.

When I got too close to a dancing girl she accidentally bumped into me, causing me to spill half of my drink's content on the floor. I bit my lip, briefly contemplating if I should clean it up – the thought quickly died again though. There were far worse things happening here than a few sips of a spilled drink, and I was already pitying Gill for having to clean all this up tomorrow.

God, I would never throw a party in my own house.

I finally joined the others again, all having gathered at the couches. Gill reached for one of the drinks I was holding, exasperation clearly written all over her face.

"Thanks, Kiri," she sighed after taking a sip. "I've tried to stay sober to control this mess, but I'll freak out if I don't get a drink."

"I got you," I replied, not even sure if she could hear me over the loud music. I went over to the other sofa, collapsing in the last free seat on it right next to Asher.

"You want this?" I asked, holding the drink out to him. He just shook his head and nodded at his water bottle.

"I've already had one."

I leaned back on the couch, hoping to just disappear between the cushions. I was tired, I was nervous, and most of all, I already had enough.

I hated that just a year ago, I would have been the one to have the most fun here. I hated how much I had changed.

"Your hands are trembling," Asher suddenly said, and I looked at him in surprise before lowering my gaze to my hands. They were, as it turned out, slightly shaking.

Raising the cup to my lips I gulped down half of its content, not minding the burning feeling in my throat.

"It's just hot," I said, shrugging. Thank god the music was so loud, otherwise he'd notice how much my voice was trembling as well.

Asher hesitated, running a hand through his hair before standing up. I raised a brow in surprise as he held one hand out to me.

"Let's go outside for a minute."

I held my breath as I took his hand, letting him help me up from the couch. Once I was standing he glanced at our touching hands for a second before letting go and making his way through the crowd. I quickly followed him, still not fully comprehending what had just happened.

Once we stepped out into the backyard a feeling of relief flooded through me, and the music along with the crowd of drunk teenagers suddenly seemed to be far away.

Asher led me towards a single tree in one corner of the backyard. A few people were out here as well, either laying in the grass or against the walls, mostly smoking and chatting quietly.

The temperatures were rather chilly, but I wasn't cold. My heart was racing out of excitement and fear – the last thing I had expected to happen tonight was Asher leading me out of the house to talk. To let him search the conversation instead of always being against it.

"This is better," he said quietly, leaning against the tree and closing his eyes. I watched him, my mind racing with thoughts but not one staying long enough to be processed into words.

"I think you're the only one to run around with a water bottle at a party," I mumbled, not confident enough to raise my voice. Asher heard me, anyway, and glanced at his bottle.