And I've Never Felt This Way Before (Lesbian Story)

Chapter 7 : The Truth Will Set You Free

Sunday morning must have been the shittiest day of my life. I woke up with another-level hangover and muscle fatigue that affected each and every single part of my body. I slept on the couch with Aaron , basically crying the whole night on his shoulder. I didn't even remember falling asleep , I was consumed by the guilt and the stupidity of the situation. I knew that I was probably overreacting , considering how sensitive I was because of the large amount of alcohol and MDMA that was still coursing through my veins. But I was even more upset about the fact that I'd stolen something precious from Casey. So , I hadn't exactly 'broken' her virginity , but I was the first person to experience her at her weakest. I was the first person to see her as he was , and if we weren't as hammered as we were , I could tell it would have been perfect. I still had to deal with the fact that I'd taken the most precious and prestigious thing about her. And I wished I could take it back. Casey had always spoken about how her first sexual encounter should be special , with someone she loved. And instead it was wasted on me , the slut , the lesbian , her best friend. Although , not to sound arragont , but most girls would be honoured to give themself up to me. And many of them did , willingly. And then of course , I broke their hearts. I left them to grieve in the silence of their suffering and stupidity as to let someone like me in , thinking I actually cared. And I shattered them. Casey's first time was with me , and that was something I had to deal with. A part of me wished she didn't remember it , but the other part so desperately wanted her to remember the raw intensity of that very moment. I didn't look at it as sex , because Casey gave me something different last night. It was pure raw emotion , and right then I realised that's why people get married , that's why people build a family , that's why it was so special. And I never understood it , sex to me was always just something fun to do. And last night I experienced it differently. It was almost like a first time for me as well , and it hurt me just as much.

I got up lazily , wobbling as my legs were so sore and weak from the night before , I could barely stand. Ash was making breakfast for Charlize , who thought it was the sweetest thing in the world. Yeah , just wait until she fuckin' tries his eggs. She'd want the breakfast to dissappear as quickly as it came , thanks to my brother's heavy hand with salt and dimwitted cooking skills as he never took the food off the stove at the right time. But , I was rather impressed. My brother was actually being nice to this girl , something he never did after sex. He could be really sweet when he wanted to be , and I found myself smiling at the thought.

"Morning." I mumbled to the both of them , my throat was coarse and I sounded as if I had a huge flu coming on. Something I always had to deal with after a poor nights sleep.

"Hey , sis. Want some breakfast?"

I shook my head and sat down at the kitchen table slowly , wincing in pain as my muscles stiffened. He chuckled and placed a cup of coffee in front of me.

"Rough night , huh? Did you pull?"

I looked up at him with a slight grin , trying to coat the sadness in my eyes.

"Sort of."

"What do you mean , sort of? Did you land some pussy or not?"

I sighed and nodded grimly , hoping he'd leave it at that. He smirked , giving me a high five before turning his attention back to his now-burnt eggs and bacon. I ignored Charlize while I sat there , and she seemed to box up awkwardly the second I walked in , which i was glad about as I wasn't in the mood to talk to her.

There was an annoyingly painful ringing in ny ears , and an uncomfortable knot in my stomach. As well as the guilt that went along with it , the pain and the shitty memory of last night that a part of me wished I could forget. The other part of me latched tightly onto it , as if it was my reason to live.