I'm Not Sorry - Trixya

- 5 -

Katyas POV

Trixie, Xen, Aja and I sit at the back of the art room together in our last class before lunch. We'd all had our noses stuck in our work the whole session. It only ever happens during art. Most other classes we talk until we're seperated. But the cool thing about Trixie being my assigned "protector" is that she never leaves my side at school.

"Hey Kats?" Trixies voice calls from across the table. I look up at her with a smile. "Do... Do you think this looks okay?" She asks showing me her artwork.

The background is a swirl of different pinks and white but she's mixed texture mediums into the paint so that it's lifted up from the canvas. On the left is the top of a tall building with the silhouette resembling that of an angle atop of it, it's body falling off the edge. Along the bottom is another silhouette but that of a city skyline.

"Trixie. It's so fucking beautiful." I muse as I look up at her. Her cheeks flush a red rosy colour.

"Thank you Kats..." She says gazing upon her work. "I don't know if Mr. Dawson will like it." She mumbles looking away and out of the window. Her breathing starts to spike and she bites her lip.

See Trixie has her own mental health issues but the teachers overlook it because it's not as noticeable to them. Noticing what's happening I push our art towards Aja. "Hey can you bring our shit to the shed later? Thanks love ya." I say with a soft smile.

Don't help her

I stand and walk around to Trixie before grabbing her hand and leaning down. "Come on." I say softly and she nods in response, standing up unsteadily. I hold her up and pull her to the locker she'd as she stumbles slightly.

As soon as we're in the shed she let's go of me and tries to make a beeline for the couch but stumbles over halfway there. Instinctively she curls up as her breathing gets even faster.

I rush to her and pull her in close. "Breath deeply. It'll go away. I promise." I say as I smooth out the curls that she messed up slightly. She nods as she starts to cry softly.

"I'm just going to talk about random stuff. You know my dad is actually Russian. Pretty crazy. He used to visit me all the time until he got a promotion at work. It means we only ever talk once a month. I love him a lot and I reckon you would too if you could understand him." I say giving me time to think about what to say as Trixie moves so she's straddling my lap.

"Also did I show you my art?" I ask and she shakes her head. "Well it's similar to yours in the sense that it's what I'm feeling inside. It's a chest that's ripped open and inside is a black void and in the void is a girl under a spotlight. Sometimes showing weakness isn't weak. Everyone has weakness but it's pushing past that which makes you strong. You're so strong Trixie and I need you to know that baby." I say rubbing her back and rocking her gently.

"Thank you Katya." She says softly, giving me a lingering kiss on the cheek. "You're amazing."

I smile softly as she hugs me. "What's something that you want, that you don't have?" I ask randomly.

"I've always wanted a cat. I want to raise one from kitten until they're old. But I'm not good at names and I'm too scared to ask mom." She says into my neck.

"That's so cute." I say before pulling her closer to me. We sit like that for quarter of an hour until Sasha comes in for her lunch period.