MBTI

What each type does on a first date

ESFJ: Vows that no matter what, they will notget their hopes up prematurely. Accidentally starts planning their wedding vows 10 minutes later.

ISFJ: Makes a mental a list of everything their date passively mentions enjoying, so they can become experts on each topic by date number two.

ISFP: Smiles shyly, makes polite conversation, and internally calculates how much of their wild side their date seems capable of handling.

ESFP: Plans a back up date that’s way more fun and adventurous than the standard date. If their date seems cool, they whisk them away on said adventure. If their date seems boring, feigns food poisoning and whisks themselves and their three closest friends away on the adventure.

INFJ: Spends so much time analyzing how their date is probably perceiving them that they forget to form an opinion about how they’re perceiving their date.

ENFJ: Vows to appreciate their date without trying to “fix” them. Accidentally resolves their date’s deep-rooted childhood trauma by the time the appetizers arrive.

ENFP: Preemptively plans the grand romantic gesture that will win their date back after they fall into a whirlwind romance that inevitably gets halted by the ENFP spontaneously moving to Africa for five or six months.

INFP: Tries to keep things casual but accidentally writes four poems comparing their date’s mouth to an exotic-tasting fruit on the subway ride home.

ENTP: Enjoys the game of trying to get their date to fall madly in love with them. Forgets to consider whether they’d like to fall madly in love with their date in return.

INTP: Acts vaguely perplexed the whole evening. Realizes three weeks later that they were, in fact, on a date.

ENTJ: Accidentally networks with their date instead of forming a romantic connection with them. Feels extremely satisfied with the outcome.

INTJ: Asks their date a series of questions related to where they see themselves in five, ten and twenty-five years. Leaves their date confused as to whether they just went on a date or an interview.

ESTP: Effortlessly sweeps their date off their feet. Feels vaguely disappointed that doing so wasn’t more of a challenge.

ISTP: Attempts to dodge the “date” aspect of the date by orchestrating as chill a situation as humanely possible. Dinner and a movie? No way. Meeting up for drinks at a bar you were going to go to anyway? Sounds better.

ESTJ: Accidentally gives their date a lecture on responsible budgeting. Ends up concluding that their date can’t afford to split the bill and feels relieved thatthey budgeted to cover the whole thing.

ISTJ: Shows up early with a bouquet of flowers and a firm intention to prove that chivalry is not, in fact, dead.