Introverted types' new year resolutions

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ISTJ

I resolve to stop picking up other peoples’ slack

Known for their strong work ethic, ISTJs like getting things done, whether it’s on the job or at home. Dutiful and committed, they can feel restless just “sitting around,” or whenever there’s no clear goal to be working toward. Want to find an ISTJ? Listen for the sound of items being furiously crossed off a to-do list. For this reason, ISTJs often find themselves quite busy. Because they’re good at managing practical matters, staying on track, and attending to all the necessary details, they’re often called upon when something needs doing. And because they believe in a “right way” to do things, they’re usually happy to lend of hand — their way, of course. They see when little issues will cause big problems down the road, and when work’s being neglected. For these reasons, they all too often end up picking up other people’s slack. When ISTJs stop taking on more than their fair share of the responsibilities, they’ll find that they have more time to relaxwork on the projects they really care about.

ISFJ

I resolve to see my needs and desires as valid rather than as burdensome or inconvenient to others.

When it comes to people, hardly any detail slips by an ISFJ. Highly observant of their surroundings and in tune with others, ISFJs notice the slouch in their coworker’s shoulders or the out-of-the-blue sneezing of their spouse. And, being natural caregivers, ISFJs won’t hesitate to offer a kind word or whip up a batch of homemade chicken soup. Making people happy makes themhappy, and they feed off the good vibes of others (even if they areplotting how to get home as quickly as possible — they are introverts, after all!). Problem is, ISFJs can end up doing so much behind-the-scenes caregiving that they neglect their own needs. They may even start to see their needs and desires as “less than” or subordinate to those of others. While wanting to help is commendable, always putting others first is a fast recipe for burnout and exhaustion. When ISFJs speak up for their needs, they keep themselves full — which is ultimately good for everyone, because you can’t pour from an empty cup.

ISTP

I resolve to pause and occasionally share my feelings with others — especially those closest to me.

Both present and pragmatic, ISTPs live for the moment. Unlike some other introverted types that could daydream the day away, ISTPs relish hands-on experiences and are solidly grounded in the here-and-now. Think: actually coding the app rather than listening to a podcast about the socioeconomic concerns of app coders. In all aspects of their life, they’d rather be getting up and doing — not necessarily as a means to an end (like the ISTJ) but rather out of sheer curiosity and a “what would happen if I did this” mentality. Their relationships are no exception. ISTPs would rather sit side-by-side with their spouse quietly watching a baseball game — it’s fun to share an experience! — rather than shower them with flowery words — too mushy! As with all their feelings, ISTPs tend to hide and protect them because they’re unsure how to express them. As a result, they can come across as distant or cold — and their friends and loved ones have no idea that they, say, actually enjoy their presence, or, for example, felt a little down yesterday. When ISTPs slow down, set down whatever they’re tinkering with, and say (even in simple terms) how they feel, they’ll finally gain that warm and fuzzy feeling of closeness with another human being that they secretly crave.

ISFP

I resolve to believe in myself as the creative badass I am and own my special artistic talents.

ISFPs are the artists of the Myers-Briggs world. That’s not to say that other personality types can’t create art, too — and it also doesn’t mean that ISFPs sit around wearing French berets and painting stills of fruit bowls. Rather, a love of beauty and aesthetics is an integral part of who ISFPs are at their core. Their art takes many forms, from graphic design to repurposing old furniture to being the most uniquely dressed person in the room. Sadly, and similar to their intuitive “cousins” the INFPs, ISFPs can struggle with self-doubt. Introverted and often shy, ISFPs are the quirky wallflowers who love getting lost in their music and sketchbooks. While many ISFPs are talented enough to be designing their own line of clothing or performing on stage, in true introvert form, they dislike the spotlight. There’s just something about sharing their creations with an audience that feels way too personal. But when ISFPs recognize their creative worth — and occasionally toot their own horn — they give their unique talents the runway they deserve.

INTJ

I resolve to do a better job of taking my own happiness into consideration when I make plans.

Nicknamed the “mastermind” and the “architect,” INTJs are the ultimate planners who are always ten steps ahead when it comes to projects they’re invested in. Future-oriented and strategic, they’ve got a vision for everything, from how they’ll be spending this evening to where their career will be in ten years. Lists, calendars, and spreadsheets are the heartbeat of the INTJ, and being Thinking types, they focus on efficiency and logic. Similar to ISTJs, they’ll feel restless when they don’t have a project to work on, and they can only “do nothing” for so long. Yet, for all their focus on goal-setting and achievement, many INTJs leave out one very important element: their own happiness. Sure, planning a road trip with as few pit stops as possible will get them to their destination the fastest, but will it make them happy along the way? In many areas of their lives, INTJs meet their goals but ignore how their emotions will ultimately affect them. When INTJs accept that they are human beings with emotions, too — and those emotions need to be planned around — they’ll find themselves becoming masters of more than just their daily workflow schedule.

INFJ

I resolve to speak up more and share what’s on my heart and mind, rather than bottling up my feelings because I think others won’t understand.

INFJs can be mysterious creatures, even to those who know them best. Private and often contradictory in nature, INFJs feel things deeply but can struggle to share those emotions with others. It’s not unusual for an INFJ to put on a convincing “everything’s fine” face even when it’s really not. Similar to ISFJs, INFJs are highly in tune with others and read people well. They know what’s expected of them, what’s socially appropriate, and even the right emotions to display at the right time — and they can see all over someone’s face when they misstep. Because INFJs can get so good at being what others need them to be, they may feel like no one sees the real them. They may bottle up their true thoughts and feelings, not expressing them because their “sixth sense” tells them that others won’t truly understand. And this can become achingly painful for this personality type, because even though they are introverts, INFJs desire to know others deeply and be known deeply in return. When INFJs choose to speak up, lower the mask, and let others in just a little bit more, they may be surprised to find the kind of intimate connections they’ve always wanted.

INTP

I resolve to listen more and with an open mind to other people’s viewpoints, even if they don’t make logical sense to me.

Highly logical and insatiably curious, INTPs were voted Most Likely to Get Banned from Reddit for Trolling. Their big-picture thinking and unrelenting logic drives them to notice when things don’t quite add up. And nothing’s sacred to the quietly rebellious INTP, whether it’s a religious belief, a time-honored tradition, and especially “the way we’ve always done things.” It’s not that INTPs are trying to come off as argumentative. In fact, INTPs are secret softies who approach the world with a deep sense of wonder and almost childlike glee. It’s just that INTPs often struggle to understand and express their emotions, favoring the logical part of their brain where they can reason things out in a way that makes sense. When INTPs resolve to listen with an open mind — rather than immediately poking holes in someone’s logic — they’ll find that others feel more comfortable opening up to them, and this can lead to the close relationships they’ve always wanted.

INFP

I resolve to stop being so hard on myself when I don’t live up to my ideals and values.

While some types focus only on practical matters or simply what’s in front of them right now, INFPs see the bigger picture. They see how the world could be, or better yet, how it should be. Idealistic and big-hearted, INFPs want to wrap the world in a gentle hug. They’ll hold your hand while you cry and say everything you need to hear simply with the look of concern on their face. They manage to see the good in almost everyone, even the most unlikable characters. Yet for all the grace and understanding they give to others, they often don’t give it to themselves in return. They beat themselves up when they fall short of their values and feel discouraged when their life and relationships don’t live up to what they’ve dreamed in their minds. And dream they do, sometimes so much that they become content with what they’ve created in their fantasy, neglecting real-world steps. When INFPs give themselves some grace — paired with taking practical, attainable steps toward their goals — they’ll find that their values aren’t so out of reach after all.

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