Hold My Girl

Chapter 32

"I'm kinda nervous" I admit to Harry as we sit up front in the sleek Audi Harry rented while we are in Scotland. We're leaving the airport and heading to my parents house, my childhood home, the house I grew up in. Avery's safely tucked up in the back and for the first time in what feels like a lifetime it is just the three of us for a whole 24 hours. Our little unit. No Jeff, no security, no band. Just me, Harry and our daughter and I kinda love it.

Things haven't changed much since Harry officially asked me to be his 'girlfriend', though I don't suppose there was much to change. We'd been going through the motions for a while, I guess now it was official and the rest of the world could stop assuming.

But the prospect of going home for the first time in over a year was scaring the shit out of me.

"Why?" Harry asked, wrapping his hand around mine and resting them on my lap while he kept his other hand clenched around the steering wheel. I took my spare hand and started tracing the small cross tattoo on the skin between his thumb and forefinger. I didn't know how to easily explain what I was feeling. Growing up, through high school and university I'd had boyfriends. I'd brought a couple of them back to 'meet my parents' and those relationships had been a lot more volatile and a lot less stable than this one. My parents had already met Harry, a fair few times, before he was my boyfriend and I knew they both liked him, so what was the big deal?

"This is just such a big change since the last time I was here. It's not like I've just not been home in a long time, I'm coming home with a baby and mega famous boyfriend in tow" I shrugged, focusing all my attention on his hand. I was too embarrassed to look up.

Eventually, when he didn't answer me, I forced myself to glance up and I could see the sharp edge of his jaw was clenched tight. I could tell by the movement of his jaw he was grinding his teeth. 99% of the time Harry was like a big cuddly teddy bear. He liked making people laugh, he was kind and approachable and if there was a joke to be made, he'd make it. But there was the odd 1% when he was more like a grizzly bear: intimidating, formidable, he could huff as good as I could and got seriously pissed off, and it was usually when I said dumb shit like that.

"I'm sorry" I whispered. "I know you don't like that and you know I don't see you like that but..."

"... Everyone else will" He laughed sardonically.

"Not everyone" I offered. I watched as his eye lashes fluttered closed over his cheeks, he shook his head then opened them again, focussing intently on the road. Silence filled the car and I wished I could take my words back.

"Would it be easier to pretend we're not together?" He bit out like the words tasted sour on his tongue.

I looked up in surprise. "No!" I forced out angrily. My anger must have taken him by surprise because his head swivelled to look at me.

"Why would you think that?" I frowned, watching Harry as his eyes darted from me back to the road then back to me.

"Because you're getting bothered by what people will think!" His eyebrows shot up into his hairline.

"Because it's a bloody big deal. In fact it would be a big deal if you were Joe Bloggs that worked in the local chippy. The fact that everyone knows who you are just puts a bit extra pressure on us. God, Harry" I sighed in exasperation. "I'm voicing my concern. Im telling you I'm nervous! It doesn't mean I don't want to be with you. It just means I'm a bit fucking scared about taking my boyfriend home to meet my family"

"Ok, I'm sorry" He admitted after a beat. His shoulders sagged and I watched as he rolled his aching jaw.

"You're a twat" I stated, turning back in my seat to stare out the window, reacquainting myself with the countryside that was passing us by as we got closer to my parents.